A Million years in a bank

Banking and Finance has never been my favorite subject during college times. No wonder why it explains my passing chits during those lectures instead of taking down notes. And this unfavoritism has continued even after college. I hate going to banks for any job.



I'd to unwillingly go to SBI near my place to submit an application for a duplicate PPF Pass book. I was directed towards a lady who was supposed to tell me what I was to do with the letter hanging in my hand and a blank expression on my face. Anyways, as soon as I calmly narrated her the purpose of my heart-rendering visit to her; she looked at me as if I've just told her my plans of eloping with her 10 yr old son. She blinked - twice exactly - and said "How did you misplace the passbook?" I couldn't draw a blanker face. If I knew I was going to misplace it, I wouldn't have misplaced it, no?


Fortunately, after she lectured me how important the passbook was, and how thankfully they had relented and let me get off without having to lodge a police complaint (which was otherwise the procedure), did she find it the right time to tell me that I was to give the PAN Card xerox too which would put an end to my miseries.

The xerox did not speeden up things. I was made to run from pillar to post first to "get The Madam's signature" on the application, then to show it to the PPF section handling lady who gave me a challan which said I was to pay Rs. 110 as the charges, then again get the challan signed by "The Madam" and finally deposit the money at one of their counters where the queue was never-ending. And there I was waiting, waiting, waiting...... waiting, waiting,.... and some more waiting, waiting in a long queue that was moving at a snail's pace... all this amidst the stench of all kinds of oils - *not aromatic essential oils - sarson, badam, coconut, palm, sunflower* - you name it and it was stinking from those black, slicky hairs of those uncountable heads. *And to think of it my mom usually asks me why I have to bathe in my deo!!* Each of them armed with a zhatak cell phone having nails-on-blackboard-ish aggressive ringtones that were ringing from every corner. To please my eyes, I pulled out my W580i; which at the moment had one little red network bar and screamed "Emrgcy calls only"... WTH!!!! Just when I needed to call back home to say I'd have to stay here a little(?) longer.

I was roasting in the line wearing a sweat-shirt, holding the extra xerox copies in one hand, the challan and the money in another and also trying to call home with my spare fingers, shouldering a nasty purse, trying to breath despite the oil-slick air pollution, cursing the slow-pokes under my breathe and swearing that I'll definitely blog this.

It did not get any easier after I'd paid though. When I asked the ancient uncle the estimated time period in which I can come and disturb their peace by making an appearance to collect the duplicate passbook, he said I'll have to ask the PPF lady. I was back to where I'd started; the PPF lady, who at the moment was busy crooning over to another lady. She did not glance up, but she acknowledged my presence by muttering a "ek minute haan". She wasn't bothered that I'd almost died of asphyxiation waiting at the line neither was she excited that I'd to almost nudge my way from the ancient uncle to her with or without "excuse me"s, she wanted to seem important and that's what she did. As it is, I was at their mercy.

"Come and check in 2-3 days" she sang; after what seemed like a million years and just when my sensory organ of smell was getting accustomed to that oily stench.

Relieved!

I've had a long day today. My eyes are dangerously threatening shut, yet I want to write about this. Because today I'm really relieved.

Without getting into the intimate details - During the recent Mumbai trip my dad had some uneasiness to deal with and so our family doctor suggested we get all the scary sounding tests done. He said it was gastric trouble but also hinted that it could be a cardiac problem. And my dad being my dad procrastinated under the excuse of "too much work". Anyways, past week we got the ECG, blood test, cholesterol done and today was the day to get the Stress test done which would determine whether the doctor's predictions were true.

Came to know that "THE REPORTS ARE ALL NORMAL"
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Almost for a fortnight I've been living in this nightmare that something was wrong with my dad. Heart disease...that's like real scary. I've seen it happen to others...but my dad?! I couldn't believe it and neither did I want to accept it. Sure, I did not make a show and made a brave attempt to hide my fears. But nights haunted me and I partly did not want my dad to get the tests done for the fear that they may confirm what the doc had just warned us about.

I just realised throughout this whole course, that I still need my parents. I can fight with them, disagree to a great extent, complain that they don't understand what I want to say, feel they are a tad too strict, but I still need them... I don't ever want to take care of them, because I want them to take care of me forever! I don't want to be a grown-up who looks after her parents... I want to be the kid that still craves for parental attention and care even when I was 5, or 15 and even when I'll be 50.

They have been pillars of support for me. They haven't necessarily petted me every time I was low. They've scolded me for being docile,coming home late, being intolerant, or just being careless. Even with all that I have seen them stay staunchly by my side, give me the courage to do what I thought I was incapable of doing. They've been my concrete and my cushion. So, I cannot see them crumbling - health wise, emotionally....

Where on one hand my mom worships tolerance, my dad cannot stand injustice... Dad will always speak his mind and won't care what the other thinks; mom will keep to herself rather than hurt anyone. Such a blend of qualities I get to see in this one home...and so many things to learn from my parents.... I think I haven't even learnt 10 % of what they have got to teach. I need them till I get to that 100. I really do.

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Thus, today when the doc announced that everything was normal and no treatment/ medicines were required; I felt a huge wave of relief sweep over me...and life, suddenly came back to normal.

"M" yada yada

Somewhere in 2008 -

Me : How many people are going to be invited for my wedding?

Mom : what? why? where's the groom?

Me : arre, I know, we are yet to find..blah blah etc. Tell no.

Mom : why but? why so suddenly are you concerned about your marriage?

Me : Tell no, please.

Mom : 300, maybe 500 or even a 1000... I don't know. Ask your dad. Why do you want to know?

Me : Nothing...just so that I know how many fake smiles I'll have to practise!
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Me : u'kno, I want a nice mother-in-law.

Mom : who doesn't?!

Me : No, like real nice... who can cook really good food.

Mom : how selfish of you... expecting MIL to cook for you. you'll continue being the lazy bum that you are even after your marriage? blah blah blah....

Me : I said she should be a good cook so that she can teach me to how to cook like her. What you thought? :P
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Somewhere in 2007 -

Me : Pedha!!

Neighbour : oh wow! for what? you are getting married, eh? Pedha and all?

Me : well...no

Neighbour : oh yeah, when you do I'm sure pedhas will be of bigger size.....

Me : :/

Neighbour : .....and not just any pedha will do, chitale ones...jumbo pedha. each of us will take one whole.

Me : :/

Neighbour : oh btw, what are the pedhas for?

Me : new car, dad bought, today.
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Reached Pune; 4 days back; to be exact with Baby J and SIL.

Too tied up to write/ check/ comment on your blogs, call/ sms/ return your calls or sms-es. Apologies! (*no, not my marriage*). Just running to the doc and to the chemist with different family member each time, and in the little time that's available, sorting my bags.

Hopefully will be back sooner than expected.

Drainex tag

I call this a Drainex tag since I sincerely hope it flushes out my blogger's block which I'm currently facing. Tejaswini had tagged me this in February :P and I, shamelessly, recalled it today and put my fingers to work, pronto! Movie trashin-bashin', wham-bam commenting freaks that we are-she decides to tag me and I decide to procrastinate, until today. So here goes.

1- Which was the movie that you had waited for with anticipation and turned out to be an utter dud?

A. That every movie I go to the theatres to watch, they are always "waited with anticipation"... and the winner here bees :: Krrish - as a sequeal to KMG, I thought it would be a good watch, as it turned out to be a childish nightmare. And recently, Delhi-6

2- Which was the one most ridiculously stupid movie you watched in a theatre and then thought that you might as well have thrown that money in a well for all it was worth?

A. Try your luck and guess! Hints :: SRK "double"-handedly screws up scene after scene with I-just-know-one-stoic-expression heroine(!!!), who is also so daft that she cannot recognize herself in the mirror. Which movie?? :P

Delhi-6 too.

3- If you had to be in a movie or a scene that you would want really really to be something that happened in real life, which would that movie or scene be and which character would you be?

A. I'd want to be Gabbar. As a kid I assigned characters of Thakur, Samba, and Kalia to my Grandpa, mom n V and rattled "arre o Samba, kitne aadmi the?" and to Thakur (much to my grandpa's irritation "ye haath mujhe de de, Thakur" and 'tera kya hoga kalia.'

ETA :: Ok I dint read the 'happened in real life part'. If thats the case then I'd want to be Akash in DCH.

4- Write three songs that would tell me what you lovvvvvvvvvve to do in your spare time...

A. They haven't yet written songs about Facebooking, no?

My three songs :

Chal akela, chal akela, chal akela... Taking the literal meaning of course - Go for a walk all alone.

Kitabein bahut si padhi hogi tumne - reading Kitabein, not faces.

Chale jaise hawayein - Sit on my terrace and facing the cool breeze.

5- Name a movie you actually thought was better than the book or atleast did justice to the book...

A. None. Seen HP, Devil Wears Prada and trailors of Hello. Books beat them anytime.

6- You are on a desert island... you found the island genie who granted you on wish that he would bring one person to join you on your exile... You have told the genie who you want that to be... apparently the genie isn't all that magical... he went to get that person and you are waiting for the procrastinating genie to get back with that person... What song do you sing while you wait?

A. Objection, Your Honour! Invalid Question. I prefer silence to singing songs. :D Ok, ok, don't raise ur eyebrows - Maybe first I'll hunt for a masakalli, write a msg to that procrastinatin' genie and then sing "kabootar ja ja ja..."

7- One song on your IPOD/mobile that was a huge hit a few months/years ago and the radio stations used to play every hour and seem to have forgotten all about now that you tend to listen to often enough

A. From the movie Metro "In dino".... I loove the song. even when they played it on Mirchi every hr and even now.

8- One song that reminds you of somebody or a group of people... Do inform why it causes you to reminisce...

A. DCH title song. That was the song that we gals were singing while gng to Shantivan on ST (n we genuinely believed it was no less adventure than gng to Goa like the DCH trio)

9- The one movie you saw most recently and which lived upto all your expectations if not more...

A. Fluke by chance - it was ok. at least it wasn't disappointing, like the rest end up to be. Can I mention Zhopdi ka kutta karodpati too?

10- The one song you have heard atleast twice today... either on the radio or the cell or on TV...

A. Me Shingapur madhe aahe. So no routine TV /Radio or cell. Mickey mouse cartoon ka gana suna lekin.

Bonus Question: In view of today being Valentine's day... Well it was when I started thinking of this tag, type down song which is meant to be romantic, but the lyrics make you think otherwise (There are a lot of Govinda songs I know, but try to think of a song not many people would know or think of)

A. Beeeeee lated Valentine, I shall call it. :D ;) I have 2 songs lined up : a. you are my samosa, you are my masala dosa.... I guess it was some famine struck lyricist that penned them down.
n b. Maine paidal se ja raha tha unhe cycle se aa rahi thi. Kiya ting ting ka ishaara mujhe badnaam kiya na - fm Hero no.1 And this person must have been kicked out of transport sector before attempting to writing songs.

ETA :: again i dint read the bracketed info and I ended up with mentioning Govinda songs. Sorry, can't think of any... can't inflict anymore tortures on my CPU.

Fun, this tag! Loved it, Tj! Muaah... *waitin to get bk and chatter endlessly. Let's meet up soon*

Betrayal

... he's gonna leave me for someone younger than me, someone who's "much more cuter" in his sister's opinion, someone who's more fun.

I don't know if I want to blame him. After all, he'd said the same things to me when I'd come in his life. I was his center of attraction, I meant the world for him, I was an apple of his eye. Then what is amiss so suddenly? Why does he do this to me? I can hardly fathom the reason for the distances between us. How did we grow apart... so easily? Is our relation so feeble that someone comes and and our love just drips dry? I have so many questions and he doesn't know the answers! Or does he... and he doesn't tell me? I'm a stranger now? So much so that we let the awkward silence do the talking between us?

There was a time when he shared his life with me. Every bit of it. Now, it is more of a ritual for him to spend the daily 2 minutes talk. And then we are back to being 2 stranger who hardly acknowledge the others' presence. I look deep into his eyes and they say nothing. I see no love, not even pity for me. I know he has outgrown me... he just wishes I wasn't with him. He wants to erase every memory, every moment that I've spent with him.He wants to write me off like a bad dream.

He's forgotten that it was me who stayed up till dawn waiting for him to get back home. He's forgotten that it was me who gave all his rants a silent hearing, not his mother, his father or his sister. Is he so heartless that he disregards all the good times we've had together? The long walks on the beach, the ephemeral hugs, the smiles that set me beaming?? All that gone.... just like that?

He hasn't told me her name. Infact he hasn't said anything at all... but I know it. One of these days, he's gonna leave me... let me go. I have to accept it however hard it'll be for me. Afterall, who cares for an old bitch like me?
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* Bitch = Female dog.

Disclaimer :: I'd like to believe that this originated in my head while watching some gibberish, hindi movie...which of course, had no relation whatsoever to this piece. If you think you have read it somewhere, some blog/ book, then in no way I intended to plagiarize it. Mera khud ka material hai.

100 questions!

Sunday and it has been boring. So I flick a tag from DD and do it.

LAST TIMES…
1. Last beverage: Coke
2. Last phone call: My Mom
3. Last text message: On March 14th, from Tejaswini asking if i'm in India or did I already leave.
4. Last song you listened to: Some english song on the radio, can't r'ber.
5. Last time you cried: Read my last blog post, you'll know it.

HAVE YOU EVER...
6. Dated someone twice: No
7. Been cheated on? : No, who'd dare do that?
8. Kissed someone & regretted it? Non
9. Lost someone special? Yes
10. Been depressed? Yes
11. Been drunk and threw up? No... i can't get drunk..atleast in this life...I can't stand alcohol.

LIST FOUR FAVORITE COLORS:
12. Purple
13.White
14. Black
15. Canary yellow

FIRSTS :
16. Made new friends: in school, in college, in colony.
17. Fallen out of love: No, grown out of crushes several times.
18. Laughed until you cried: Many a times.
19. Met someone who changed you: Yes
20. Found out who your true friends were: Yes
21. Found out someone was talking about you: No. :)

HAVE YOU:
22. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: No.
23. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: 95% of them.
24. How many kids do you want to have: ???? Two
25. Do you have any pets: No and I wouldn't want to have any.
26. Do you want to change your name: Initially yes... now NO.
27. What did you do for your last birthday: Sat by the phone. recd wishes from everyone, followed by dining out with parents and finally doing a tag on the blog.
28.What time did you wake up today: 8:30 Sg time. So thats 6 AM IST. :)
29. What were you doing at midnight last night: watching Bheja fry
30. Name something you CANNOT wait for : Ppl to ping me ol.
31. Last time you saw your father: last week
32. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: it wouldn't be my life if i changed it, no?
33. Most visited web page: Gmail/ my blog/ FB/ Rediffmail

WHAT'S YOUR :
34. Name: PURNIMA
35. Nicknames: heeehehee..long list there.. I'll mention the preferred ones here : Purni/ Poo/ PP/ Purnu
36. Zodiac sign: Aquarius
37. Male or female or transgender : Female
38. Elementary: a nice, boring school in Pune
39. Colleges: BMCC.. it rocked!
40. Hair color: Natural Dark brown.
41. Long or short: lill more than shoulder-length
42. Height: Taller than ppl shorter than me, shorter than ppl taller than me. :)
43. Do you have a crush on someone? oh yes! yes, i do.
44. Ever been in love? Yes...so many times.
45. Piercings? Pierced ears
46. Tattoos? No and never
47. Righty or lefty: Righty
48. First surgery: None and i plan to keep it that way for my lifetime.
49. First piercing: 12 days after i was born.
50. First best friend: Poorvaja
51. First sport you loved: and still love - cycling
52. First pet : a parrot that came unannounced
53. First vacation: i think it was Agra/ haridwar etc..something...can't r'ber.
54. First concert: what??!
55. First crush: Mithun Chakravarthy, at the age of 4, mind ya. ;)

RIGHT NOW:
56. Eating: thandi hawa
57. Drinking: nothin
58. I'm about to: get more bored than I'm already
59. Listening to: the vehicles speed by the expressway.
60. Waiting for: trip back home. :( I'm homesick.

YOUR FUTURE
61. Want kids? Sure. :)
62. Want to get married? Of course, why not?
63. Careers in mind? Translator/ interpretor/ teacher. and my dream career is to be a carpenter.

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?
64. Lips or eyes: Eyes
65. Hugs or kisses: Depends on the relation. I can't hug /kiss random men! LOL
66. Shorter or taller: Taller than me.
67. Older or Younger: Older
68. Romantic or spontaneous: a bit of both
69. Nice stomach or nice arms: Nice Arms
70. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive
71. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship, all the way.
72. Trouble maker or hesitant: Trouble maker

HAVE YOU EVER :
73. Kissed a stranger: Am I SO mad?
74. Lost glasses/contacts: Neva, I'm too careful abt them.
76. Broken some one's heart: I dunno..if i have, that person hasn't told me.
77. Had your own heart broken: Yes :( Mommmmyy!
78. Been arrested: I lead a perfectly legal life. :D
79. Turned someone down: Yes
80. Cried when someone died: Yes
81. Liked a friend that is a girl? : My girlfriends are my lifelines. how can I not like them?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
81. Yourself: Yes
82. Miracles: yes, no, maybe.
83. God: Totally, completely.
84. Love at first sight: Nopesie
85. Heaven: yes, go eat Karim's kebabs and you'll know what I'm talking abt.
86. Santa Claus: nah!
87. Kiss on the first date? umm...gotta think
88. Angels: no... but angelic streaks in ppl, yes
89. Devils: ditto as abv.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
90. Is there one person you want to be with right now? Yes.Yess.Yesss. and that person isn't with me. :(
91. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? No
92. Wanted to kill someone ever? yes and i still wanna kill them.
93. Among you blog mates, whom would you like to kiss? why is this tag so interested in knowing ppls' kissing kahanis?? anyways, no
94. Committed a blunder and regretted later? : I'm a blunder waiting to happen.
95. Wanted to steal you friend's boyfriend / girlfriend? Nah! i don't chino dusron ke sar dards.

ASSOCIATE WITH SOMETHING YOU WEAR :
96. White: socks
97. Black: Kohl
98. Red: PJ
99. Pink: Lipstick
100. Posting this as 100 Truths? of course.

I tag you, Rayshma.