Just another tag

Blog hopped and flicked a tag from this blog.


Rule: Strike out all that you have done from the following list.

1. Graduated high school... 

2. Kissed someone Code … I refused to strike it off unless i understand what it means. 

3. Smoked a cigarette... 

4. Got so drunk you passed out...

5. Rode every ride at an amusement park... 

6. Collected something stupid...  

7. Gone to a rock concert...

8. Helped someone… 

9. Gone fishing…

10. Watched four movies in one night…. 

11. Lied to someone…

12. Snorted cocaine...

13. Smoked weed...

14. Failed a subject - Believe it or not, I flunked French with the rest of the class. :D

15. Been in a car accident...

16. Been in a tornado...

17. Watched someone die…. ants, roaches and mosquitoes that i swat

18. Been to a funeral...

19. Burned yourself… small istri chatkas

20. Run a marathon…

21. Cried yourself to sleep… ahem ahem

22. Spent over 10,000 bucks in one day… 

23. Flown on an aeroplane...

24. Cheated on someone...

25. Been cheated on… i didn't get this?

26. Written a 10 page letter… 

27. Gone skiing.. 

28. Been sailing… 

29. Cut yourself... 

30. Had a best friend... naah, Have best friends. still...

31. Lost someone you loved… 

32. Got into trouble for something you didn’t do

33. Stolen a book from the library….

34. Gone to a different country...

35. Watched the Harry Potter movies... - not all

36. Had an online diary… 

37. Fired a gun...

38. Gambled in a casino

39. Been in a school play... school dance "There was a little princess..."

40. Been fired from a job ... nobody, absolutely nobody can fire me!

41. Taken a lie detector test...

42. Swam with dolphins...

43. Voted for someone on a reality TV show - Abhijit Sawant and Amit Sana got one vote each from me.

44. Written poetry… ya, pathetic ones in school

45. Read more than 20 books a year… 

46. Gone to Europe... will strike this out soon enough

47. Loved someone you shouldn’t have - my puppy love, Mithun da!

48. Used a coloring book over age 12 

49. Had a surgery...

50. Had stitches...

51. Taken a Taxi...

52. Had more than 5 IM conversations going on at once… he he he, those were some days!

53. Been in a fist fight...

54. Suffered any form of abuse...

55. Had a pet… my pet parrot... waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!

56. Petted a wild animal... - is snake a wild animal? reptile animal, maybe?

57. Had your own credit card, bought something with it... - :'(

58. Dyed your hair… colored it brown, mom disapproved :'(

59. Got a tattoo...

60. Had something pierced... - I was 12 days old brave baby when i had my ears pierced!

61. Got straight As... naah, i always went down with a 'B' in drawing! hmmmph!

62. Known someone personally with HIV or AIDS...

63. Taken pictures with a webcam...

64. Lost something expensive … can I be corny and say my heart?? :P

65. Gone to sleep with music on... - naah, need peace when i sleep. no muzic.

Beauty Parlour Blahs

Any woman that denies having stepped into the oh-so-womanly beauty parlour, at least once in their lifetime, is certainly lying. And here, i talk about the current generation, not that of our moms and grand-moms and great great grand-moms and the likes. It is but natural that women have started venturing out, are more active and are no longer restricted to the confines and comforts of their homes. In short, all such women-lib crap. (Clarification: Women's-lib is not crap - why i mentioned it here maybe...) On second thought, womens-lib is crap.

Let's admit that parlours do enhance the way you look. Maybe they can't change your structure forever(excuse the cosmetic surgeons and the various brow lifts and face lifts and rhinoplasties and chin tucks and ear staples- I'm talking about the normal, average, those ones found in every society wala, beauty parlour); but they can certainly make you look much presentable than you might usually do.

I too have beauty parlour sessions from time to time, and there's no denying to that. The first time I set my foot into one was when I was in college... don't remember when. But i do remember that mom had pushed me to get my eyebrows shaped. I had this bushy, fat eyebrows that needed trimming - as mom put it. I never stopped to think about my eyebrows. I was bewildered at the thought of getting my eyebrows plucked. I begged my mom to come along... but she wouldn't have it. "The way you act anyone would think you are going in for some bypass surgery". Of course, to me it was no less than one. Did I mention that my aunt who shared her experience with eyebrow threading had told me that it pained so awfully and she couldn't stop sneezing and the whole session took about an hour to get her eyebrows in shape? There you go... scary, innit?   

Yes, I have come a long way from there. Though I no longer hyperventilate at the idea of threading, I still have    my apprehensions.

To say I have delicate, sensitive skin would be a boorish understatement. My skin jumps at least provocation. And so, I launch myself into giving a short tape recorded speech to beauty parlour aunties (BPAs) when they rant 1001 solutions to soft and supple skin, that usually includes various face massages, bleaching, herbal creams, ayurvedic mud packs, costly Parisian lotions etc. And may I please add, at their esteeeeemed parlour - the one stop solution to all my skin care miseries. Most of the time, I successfully wish-wash their skin care hocus-pocus by mumbling *sensitive skin, doesn't take all this so well*. 

However, let me tell you, these aunties are doctors by their own standards. One look at your skin and they tell you how cruelly you treat your skin. How insensitively you put it through, dhool-mitti-pradushan day by day, week by week, month by month, year after year... Each time I go for a session, say even for a 45 minute hair trimming one, I have to face the insults thrown at me. My hair is always dry, I don't use conditioner, I don't got for hot oil massages, I don't trim it as often as I should, which shampoo I use, why I use that one, why not the one she suggested, when will I learn, how difficult it'll be after marriage, more so after kids, i should learn to take care of myself, 5 minutes everyday I can't spare for my own good - These are the accusations hurled at me that I hence unabashedly concur. 

I try. I do try. Really. Really hard. That is, to fall in line, to take a step towards the betterment of my neglected beauty regime. But that's not the only thing I do, is it? Get this, conditioner + wrapping my head in hot towel should tentatively take not more than 7-9 minutes. But by the time I somehow clumsily get the knack of wrapping the towel, it has already turned cold. I'm back to heating the towel. 

Not to mention how many times I call out to my distressed mom to give me a hand at it. I give up. Of course, I haven't yet admitted this to my BPA yet. Else I'd be in another you-don't-listen-to-me charade. I wonder if "How to humiliate your customer" is a part of their training. 

And then, there are those whose expertise lie in painting your face in bright colours during occasions like weddings and receptions. The only time that I handed over my face to BPAs is during V's wedding and mine. And that includes the reception too. While the wedding make-ups were commendable, the reception ones turned out to be a nightmare. Believe me, me being fair skinned, they slather every possible cream and foundations to make me look fairer. Then they team it up with the darkest and brightest shaded lipstick that they can lay their hands on. The result? I look a classic example of Noorie. That's what my cousin calls me each time he looks at my snap. All my lamentations fall on deaf ears while parallely giving me the know-it-all-looks i-know-what-looks-best-on-your-skin-tone look.

What annoys me is, no amount of convincing works on them. I guess like you can't argue with your doctor or your lawyer, you can't argue with the BPA's either. So I have devised a way out. The day I need to visit my BPA, I apply moisturizer - of any kind that's available at home but make sure to name the correct brand that she has suggested, bathe in conditioner - again, of any kind that's available at home but make sure to name the correct brand that she has suggested, smile a lot to erase any guilt off my face and say, "hey look I use this product you suggested and it works like magic for me" smile, smile, smile, smiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiile. Dare her to argue, she won't. This is how I defeat my BPA in her own battlefield. Oh, how vindicated I feel! :D

P.S. I hope my BPA doesn't land here... or i'm done for!

P.P.S I hope none of you are BPAs... I'm still done for!!!

A Mistake

Her hands were shaking as she stared at the red - coloured strip in her hand. She was unable to comprehend what had gone wrong.

All of 15, she was a brilliant girl, who'd make her parents proud one day. She was synonymous with intelligence, perfection and excellence. No mathematical problem was ever too difficult for her; science was a piece of cake. She showed keen interest in social sciences too.Even though English bored her, she never let that show up on her score card. She had every signs of making it big; given her hunger to keep learning more. 

Everyone knew she was brainy. She knew she was brainy. She knew she was the right mix of common sense and intelligence. That actually made up for the lack of physical beauty. She thought she was O.K. looking - not too good, neither too bad. No one ever noticed her skinny figure, or her unshaped eyebrows or even an occasional pimple on the nose. This girl exuded great confidence. Confidence to excel, confidence never to go wrong. 

Then what went wrong today, she wondered. None of it was going as planned. How could the strip have changed its colour? She couldn't help but panic as she turned her attention once again to the damned thing in her hand. She had a burning sensation in her throat. She thought about what she had done. She had made sure nothing would go wrong. In fact she was careful... very careful knowing well in advance of the repercussions if anything failed. 

Rewinding her mind, she wondered if she could do anything to make amends. Truth was, she did not have any time to undo the error. She stood trembling and sweating while realisation hit her that there was nothing she could do now. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed him nearby. What would he say to her when he comes to know about this? Worse, how would she face her parents? This was certainly not expected of a girl who was so "her". Her confidence level that usually rid the sky, came crumbling down with these thoughts. 

He was within a hand's distance now and would soon be face to face with her. She almost swooned with fear and anxiety as he moved towards her with a smile. 

"What's wrong?... You look as white as a ghost... or did you see one?" he attempted weak humour at that tensed moment. Her predicament became evident to him when he saw what she was holding between her shaky fingers. 

He crinkled his nose and made some clucking noise, stamping disapproval. Disappointment was writ large on his face... or so she thought. 

"You never once made mistakes in your science experiments!!! Then how come during this crucial exam time your blue litmus paper has turned red?"

Lovely gift!

Furious preparations for our wedding is going on... so from now until the very day my calenders are marked. Currently, me and amma have taken up the responsibility of inviting Pune friends and family.

We just started out today... and how could I not go to one of my best friend's house to invite her??? So, yeah, Tejaswini's place was one of the selected few that we have decided to invite personally.Within 10 minutes of we being there, this girl couldn't sew in her excitement to hand over the gift she bought for me...well, rather thought for me. Well, her extra bubbly-ness was understandable since the gift was...

and the other side being....

I dunno in what words I can thank you, Tj! This is precious! :')

Time's up!

Pack my stuff.

Turn my back.

One last look.

I care a damn!

Truth or Dare?

At 11 AM, while in midst of household chores, the door bell rang. She expected a delivery boy standing with a smile on his face and a bouquet of red roses in one hand and probably a gift in another. This is what happened every year during the Valentine's day. She opened the door; and it certainly was a delivery boy with a smile on his face, a bouquet of red roses in one hand and a small gift wrapped packet in another. She couldn't help but smile at her own timed guess.


After 6 years of marriage and a 3 and half yr old son, her husband still sent her roses. Each year, without forgetting. Valentine's day, her birthday and their wedding anniversary... there were flowers and gift for each of these occasions. Often the celebrations wouldn't just stop there. This was always followed by a dinner and movie date too. For the 'nth time she blessed her stars to have such a wonderful, loving husband for life.


As she trimmed the stems of the flowers to arrange them in a porcelain vase(which was again a gift from him), her mind went back to the time when she was newly married. It was an arranged marriage. The horoscopes were matched, there were initial background checks, photographs were exchanged and finally a date was set for them to meet and "see" each other. When she saw him for the first time, there were no dramatic violins playing, nor were there any electric currents. He was good to talk to and seemed fairly decent. Assent from both the parties had set the ball rolling. Within no time they were engaged to be married.


The marriage ceremony that followed shortly, sailed smoothly with practically zero hitches. Before she knew it, she was trying to adjust herself to the new environment, new life and a new person she was to call her husband. It was an uphill task at first, but given the calm and adjusting nature of her husband, she was set into a comfortable routine.


All her relatives vouched for their "fairy tale" marriage. Some would say "A match made in heaven"... some would say "Your parents arranged a perfect love marriage for you." and still others would exclaim "You couldn't have asked for anything better!!!"


Her marriage was not that picture perfect, as others saw it. They had their own little ups and downs. She fought with him when he forgot to water their plants; he raised a hell when she misplaced his office I-card. She found it irritating when he invited a host of his friends at the 11th hour; he plugged in ear plugs when she started practicing her carnatic music. Though when last year their kid suffered from Measles; teary-eyed, both of them were up whole night to tend to their little life. Such was their household - Perfect with mini imperfections.


She sighed, realising the fact that she was leading a fulfilling life. However this realisation, always brought in a feeling of guilt with it. Did she actually deserve such happiness? Was this all an illusion created by her? Was she living under the pretext that she was happy, and that she is building a happy life for herself, her husband and her kid?


Her mind reeled back to the time when she was learning carnatic music during her college years. Her Guru was none other than her neighbour who was around the same age as she. He insisted she thought of him as a friend and not call him "Guruji". Chemical engineer by profession; pursuing carnatic music was more of a hobby to him. She respected him. She worshipped him. His hunger for knowledge and her thirst for music found a perfect rhythm. Feelings towards him started blossoming in her young heart. Soon she nurtured a special place in her life for him. She never thought it was necessary to express her feelings to him. Why should she? She knew he could see her devotion towards him. She convinced herself that he too felt the same. She saw her enriched life before her... her boundless dreams were getting closer to fulfillment.


One such day when they met, he broke the news to her. He was going abroad. That was only what she heard. "My college friend is planning to set up a venture there. We had talked about this long ago... things have started shaping up now... ... He wants me to join him there now... .... .... This is a life time opportunity for me.... " - all this fell on her deaf ears. All she heard was "I am going abroad." He hadn't said what she yearned to hear. As if to underline her cringing feelings he said "Be sure you get married next year and not before that. How will I come? I cannot travel back within a year, right? By the way, your husband is going to be one lucky guy!"


And, the door bell rang again, announcing the arrival of her son from kindergarten. Her reverie continued in spite of the noisy chatter of the kid. She never mentioned having feelings for her music teacher to her husband. She never thought it was necessary. What would she say? After all, she had never confessed her feelings to her teacher. He had never acknowledged them either. It wasn't obsessive love. Then what was it?


Emotions surged within her. Was she doing the right thing by not letting her husband know about this phase of her life? Would this compound truth rip out their love, trust and respect? Would he shrug it off? Laugh it off? or will it haunt him for the rest of his life? Was that phase really "love" or was it infatuation? Her music teacher, her friend, was he just like a supportive elder brother? Had she misread his intentions? Was she betraying her husband? Was she masking herself... or at least a part of herself? What would happen to her 6 year old marriage? Should she tell him the truth? Or should she dare conceal it?


No, not this time, she thought, today is just too perfect.


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Placing yourself in her shoes, what would you do?

I am 25!

It's my Birthday today! :D 25 years successfully completed! :)

Of course, of my total 25 years, I remember 20 years properly i.e. about the time we moved to Pune. Thus, I shall account for only those 20 years that's stuck to my memory.

April 1990 :: New home. New School. New area; almost devoid of human population. I faintly remember hovering around amma and V; for I was lacking friends.

I remember -

playing Hide n Seek with amma as soon as we came home from school.

racing up the stairs with V to see "Who touches the main door first?" More often than not, he won!

not liking my class teacher, Mrs. De Silva; and praying each day that she be absent. "Oh please god please, let her fall sick today!"

participating in a song and dance performance for school annual day "There was a little Princess...". (Mukta, were you the princess??)I remember searching for my parents in the auditorium when, accidentally, I was the only one standing in front of the large audience after the curtain was drawn. I can never forget their smile which gave me the courage to stand there, without crying, despite the huge lump in my throat.

1991 - 1994 :: School time. Some new friends. New games. Amma's strict warning "Come back home by 7 PM... anytime later will not be tolerated". This discipline stayed throughout. Even today, though deadlines have been eased out, I still need to report my whereabouts including details - with who I am, where am I going and a rough estimate on when I get back.

1995 - 1999 :: Major metamorphosis. From a child to adolescent. From a kid sister to younger sister. From a frolicking-playing-care-free-daughter to ideally-should-be-mature-daughter. From a friend to best friend. Opinion clashes - with amma, with V, with friends. In short, adolescence at its helm.

2000 :: At the threshold of "LIFE". SSC board exams. Still undecided future prospects. V's accident. Domestic hitches. Advices pouring in. Suggestions wafting by. Confusions galore.

2001 :: First glimpse of BMCC, where I was to spend my next 5 years, until I graduated. Fear of ragging. New friends again. New relations. New realization. New found "Rebellious ME".Licked freedom for the very first time. Bunked Pharande's Maths lecture. Got firing from amma. Met my BFF, Pallavi.

2002 :: HSC Board. "Bring it on" attitude. Prodding into college activities.

2003 - 2005 :: Freedom at its best. No lectures attended. Blacklisted. Squirmed out from the parents-teacher meet situation. Extended childhood at home. Certificates for Extra curricular activities. Discovered my liking for French. Alliance Francaise followed shortly.

2005 - 2007 :: Officially/ Unofficially/ Casually/ Formally/ Socially, FINALLY, according to people and parents, I was of marriageable age. Search parties let out to find "THE" one for me. Despite the complaints, despite the tantrums, despite pleadings, despite emotional blackmails... search continued. Reluctance to attend social functions for the fear of being "spotted" by the prospective groom's family. Break from French classes. MBA/ DBM classes occupied evening time.

2007 - 2008 :: French Resumed. Completed Diplome with Distinction. Hunt for job begun. Landed one for teaching French at an institute.

2008-2009 :: Still teaching French. Frustration at so called-job. Suggestions from amma for a small compromise regarding job aspects. Stubborn-ness not to compromise and stick to what I thought. Grooms pouring in with myriad "expectations". Aunts calling up to "suggest" "great matches" for me. Only to be thrown away with a side-glance.

2009 Beginning :: Job hunt still on the go. Interviews here and there. Self assurance of doomed future. Met a stranger... and soon forgotten.

2009 Mid :: Singapore trip for a whole month and half. Refreshing stay. Away from frustrations. Away from groom-hunts. V, N and Baby J and fun. Baby J's unending fever. Tensions.

2009 Mid :: Furious job hunt. Landed 3 interviews. Got through all three. I got to choose one of them. The stranger and me, met once again.

2009 Mid - End :: Office -home, home- office. Fun at office. One of my best friend gets married. Stranger was a friend now.

2009 Mid - End :: Routine set in. Enjoyed the routine. Small hitches in office life. Blinded by friendship.

2009 December :: A curtain raiser for me. A clearer vision. Friend was not "just a friend". There was more to it than just friendship. Got respective parents involved. Parents meet. Parents say "yes" and a happy "yes" at that. I welcomed Kiran in my life...

2010 :: Kiran who was once upon a time a stranger, then a friend, then a great friend became my boyfriend, my lover and is now my fiancé and will soon be my life partner. Preparations for a new life begins...

One chapter of my life ends here. Only to start writing a new one after a few more days. As amma says "This is your last birthday as "Prabhu"."

Of course there was more to it than I have mentioned here. In a nutshell, however, this is how my 20 years would look like.

A new set of relations to be handled, new responsibilities, changed status and balancing acts will soon start. It scares me... it excites me, nonetheless.

I guess, at 50 I'll make another post like this, accounting for the life journey from now till then.

P.S. This rocked!

:) :) :)