Of Awards and Rewards

Yes, this is mine now! :D 

 

This is my first blog award! Uma, a fellow blogger, finds me worthy enough to be a proud recipient of "The Versatile Blogger" award. Thanks a ton, Uma! It feels great to be appreciated for something you do so passionately!


Well, this isn't just an award to be displayed; there's also a tag. :) I'm happy to oblige!


Rules for the tag :




1. Thank the person who nominated you for the award


2. Nominate 15 other bloggers and inform them of the same


3. Share 7 Random facts about yourself


And,


4. Add the Versatile Blogger Award picture to your Blog Post


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I am no one to judge how good or deserving a blog is. So I am gonna give out this award to the bloggers whose blogs I really look forward to reading... In random order


1. Namratha : Her blog, Grey Shades has many more shades than just Grey! The posts reflect her thoughts so clearly that I can see Namratha thinking! Some of those thought provoking ones are loaded with sublime humour. She makes you think, she opens your eyes and she's never afraid to call a spade, a spade.

That's why I like her and her blog too!

2. Nandita : Nandita's Little Space is full of awesome stuff and still not cluttered. I think you should read her to know what I am talking about. Sometimes she makes me go "Damn! Now, how come I didn't think of writing about this?" :)

3. Nitin : He has streaks of journalistic writing. His blog is often related to facts and current stuff going on around us. Certainly not for someone who's looking to read for time pass. His lucid posts are out there making a point; there's always a direction to his posts - never diverting or random.

You can read him at I Am, Therefore I Think!!!

4. Phatichar : Calls himself Phatichar, but his blog is anything but that. The fiction he writes is mindblowing. Although I have not read as much as I'd have loved to read, I think he deserves it for those awesome stories.

5.  Preeti Shenoy  : She is one of my favorite authors! If you have just read her books and like her; you should definitely read her blog that is frequently updated - You'll fall in love with her!!! Conferring this award upon her  is like Tusshar Kapoor presenting the Lifetime Achievement Award to Amitabh Bachchan!

Why I love her? Her posts are full of optimism, fresh and interactive. Not only does she write wowsome, she also makes sure to respond to each and every comment for her posts.

6. Rachana : I can hardly believe that its the same girl who blogs here. I have never met her, but we have been chatting online for some years now. She is an absolute nutcase which feeds my innate necessity of being crazy too! She has blogging ka brain alag and chatting ka brain alag! I am not nominating her for being my online friend, it's truly her blog that qualifies to this award.

7. Aparna : It's been quite a while since she updated her blog, but she still remains one of my favourite blog writers. I hope this tag will bring her back to the blogging world. Follow this link to her blog.

8. Uma : Of course, she already owns this one. Yet, just to let know that her blog rocks too!

I am modifying this tag a bit. Instead of gloating about me as always, let me take this opportunity to thank all my readers, and I mean ALL! I used to feel a wee bit dejected when I didn't find overflowing comments for my posts and also that I never got any "blogger awards". But then, there came so many encouraging mails, praises and feedback from friends and relatives that I do feel greatly appreciated.

You know who you all are! Thank you so much for taking some time to write to me. It is rewarding to accept your good wishes and blessings. You have great deal of faith in me, and many expectations. When I receive such emails from you (often so unexpectedly), even when they are one liners, it makes my day.I do hope to continue entertaining you as always and bore you a little too. :)

My Babe...

I'm at loss of words when I try to say something about my daughter. It sounds vague but I still have phases of disbelief that I have given birth to a baby. She is miraculous, angelic and devilish at the same time.

I had a planned C -section. I was admitted to the hospital the night before, and what a night that was! Full of anticipation, excitement, and relief that finally those 9 months have gone by. Fear was overshadowed by all these emotions. In fact, I even took permission to take a look at the OT. The wide array of neatly kept instruments and vials of medicines looked appealing. 

The next day, in semi conscious state, I saw the nurse take my baby away for cleaning. I was surprised even then, like I never expected a baby to come out of me!!

'That's it? Done?' I asked the doctors.

'Yes. Of course.' one of them replied and smiled.

'So, is it a girl or a boy?'

'What did you want?'

'Umm... let's see... my husband wanted a boy and I wanted a girl. Who won?'

'You did. It's a girl.'

I was stupefied... for all those experienced ladies'(including my mom and MIL) predictions that I was gonna have a baby boy, I had pink in store for me. I was proud... I was super happy. My deep,secretly hidden wish to bear a daughter was fulfilled. 

That's her! Crying in full glory!

We named her 'Aarnavi', which means as large hearted as an ocean. The name was decided by me and KK, long time back. We loved the meaning and the way it sounded. 

Mothering is not an easy task. Just because moms make it look simple, doesn't mean it is a cake walk. There have been times when I have broken down and cried over not being able to be a perfect mom. I realise that even I need time to get adjusted to the baby. Physically as well as emotionally. 

I was in huge emotional mess due to physical constraints. Delivering C section came with its disadvantages. Initially, limited mobility, absolute necessity of rest, the twitching and the heaviness kept me from caring for my baby. And I am not the most ideal person with patience in hand. I thought everything falls into place once the baby is out. I was mistaken. I had to learn everything.

Mothering is a natural instinct, everyone said. Perhaps only the emotional part comes naturally. Everything else, needs to be learnt from the scratch. From how to hold the baby to breastfeeding it, requires some time and technique.

No two days are similar for me. There are ups and downs. And I am trying to learn on how to increase my patience level, and not feel demotivated each time I fail to do something perfectly.

As my child teaches new lessons everyday, I am coming to learn those big and small aspects of motherhood. It's difficult but not impossible. 

My darling has brought me and KK even closer. We both are amazed at her little antics. The sudden smile, the loud wail, she has your nose, she has my feet, she stays up all night- must be your trait...

Husband's already in the US. Waiting for us to join him there. Till then we both are trying to get to know each other. :)

Blissfully unaware of the circus she creates around the house, she sleeps!

P.S. More posts in line. Kindly check.

It's a

GIRL!!!!

January Update

Getting admitted tonite. Have planned C-section tomorrow. I am excited alright! Will finally be coming face to face with my little one. I have no idea on how I will react when I finally hold my (OMG, really?) MY baby.... there is a lot of curiosity, whether it's a boy or girl, does s/he have head-ful of hair, does the nose resemble KK's or mine.... I truly cannot explain my state of mind.

I am anything but scared.... in fact I am so waiting for the result to be out! I am less than 24 hrs away from cuddling Jr.

I probably will not be able to update this space as often as I have been doing. But I am sure gonna try. And as for letting you guys know about the arrival of Jr., will ask KK to let you in on the secret!

This is the first time that I have bitten my nails in happiness till they have disappeared!

Guess what? Tomorrow, I am gonna be a mother for life! :)

Random Update

I'm still here. Fine and eating and  most importantly, sleeping! Jr.'s arrival is probably a week or ten days away. So this is real test of time. It is dragging and dragging.

Every time I sleep, I dream of my baby. Once I saw a boy, second time I saw a girl and third time I didn't know the gender. So I guess I really have no preference for a boy or a girl. I'll be happy with either of them. :) :)

I am due for a USG and doc appointment tomorrow and the day after, resp. I'll probably have something solid to say on when Jr. is planning his/ her arrival. hee!

BTW, I wonder if the preggyfection is getting to all my friends. Everyone's following the suit! :)

I am 90% gonna have a C-section. But then, you never know. Here I might be thinking about evading the labor pains and Jr. might just change his/her mind and position. :P I know I am impulsive; guess Jr.'s too!

We have baby names ready; well since a very long time. And I absolutely luuuuuv them! No, I am not revealing the alphabet. Keep guessing until I tell you.

I am reading blogs regularly like I did earlier. Just this time I am not commenting, because I feel terribly lazy to click on the link. Similarly there are a lot of blog posts in my head too that I wish I could do but I am not doing them.

I attended my best friend's reception and gathered a lot of attention and "all the bests" from many.  Ooooo... I loved being the center of attention! Every one said that I don't look fat. That creamed me.

That reminds me, last time I said I hadn't put on any weight. Taking the comment to heart my dear KK stuffed me with food for whole 7 days and that showed on the doc's weighing scale. I'd put on 2 kgs in one week! :O

KK had his birthday the previous week. And I didn't buy him a gift, neither had any surprise planned like I'd done last year.  It was quite family affair. My dad surprised us by getting a cake and flowers. It was followed by a family dinner in a nearby restaurant.

Well, that's about it for now. Will probably update once again day after.

:) :) :)

December Update II

Just a week back got a colour doppler USG. That's some fancy way of checking the baby. :P Anyway, last time I mentioned Jr. was lying in oblique position, this time however, s/he is not. Jr. decided to play hopscotch with the long long umbilical cord and as a result has gotten it looped around his/ her neck (loosely), not once but twice. Yeah, Jr. seems to be naughty already!

Despite me hogging all day like a pig, my weight has not increased even by half a kg, which invited "You need to eat more" from the doc. I don't know how much more I can manage eating when I am reaching for the food plate very 15-20 mins. *And I am eating everything, from chicken to fish to veggies to yummies* Sigh!

Meanwhile, the doc has asked to wait until the 28th December... to take it lying down till then, which means total bed rest. And there would be a final USG to check for Jr. updates. I am most likely to have C-section.

So, am I scared or upset? I thought I would be, but I am not. In fact I am more irritated when I learnt the tailor lady has misplaced my saree blouse! I wanna blow her head off! I was planning to wear that saree for my best friend's reception which falls this Sunday!

Another Jr. news :: Since Friday night, s/he suddenly became lethargic and hence kicked and tumbled less.  That was enough to bring my heart in my throat. No amount of pushing and poking the bump made any difference. I made KK cancel his plan to attend office picnic and rushed to the doc.

As soon as we reached the hospital and Jr. heard doc's voice, s/he was back in action, showing his/ her favorite antics. The heartbeats were normal too. Phew!!!! !!!!! *Now I somehow understand mom's phone call whenever I came home late* 


Currently, night time has become like circus. I wake up at odd times, either to eat or to complain about my sciatic nerve pain or to pee or to drink water or I wake up just like that.

Though, I would love to update it after the next doc visit, I dunno if I will be able to. I have been advised to lie down as much as possible.

Ending note : I am terribly excited, now that the countdown has finally begun (and that there is uncertainty on when the doc's gonna get me delivered) and humongous amount of curiosity - baby boy or baby girl!

BTW, my best friend Shweta gave birth to a baby boy, AVI, C section. Both are doing well... and I am so excited for them too!!!!!!

The Day He Didn't Propose Me...

Every love marriage has a proposal day. Even we have our proposal day, but with a difference. He didn't "propose" me. He did it but didn't really do it. Confusing, isn't it?

That day for us was December 3rd, 2009. I expected it to be a normal working day for me at the office. And, it was. We both used to be online, working and chatting with a dozen people. However, my first priority and preference would always be KK. Yes, I nurtured a special place for him, but was still unsure myself. I hadn't yet acknowledged my feelings, let alone confessing it to KK. 

A light flirt that he was, he would warn me that he'll come and whisk me away for a candle light dinner. I crunched his hopes by saying - ask my parents, if they say yes, I might think about it. One day he declared that he would come to my office with a bouquet of roses, just so that my colleagues will start gossiping about me. Again I punched hole in his high hopes by saying you have to find out where I work. Such was our harmless teasing- flirting bit. Whatever we talked about, he was never indecent. He never teased too much, nor did he ever cross his limits. He was never desperate. It was pure friendship on the borderline of flirtism. * I make good words* 

This day that year, while chatting merrily, he suddenly went silent. I asked him if he ran away. 

"Nope, I am waiting for you to come at the train station. Just like SRK in DDLJ"

I knew the crazy streak in him had started playing. Somewhere there, my doubts got better of me and perhaps I was fed up of this chor-police chuppa chuppi; I asked him if he was serious. From there on, the conversation started taking a serious bend. He said he was never as serious and wanted to take all this ahead. I still find it hard to translate those feelings of mine in words. To talk freely, I asked him to give me a call. The moment he said "hello", I decided I am marrying this guy. He had a wonderful voice, which matched his personality. (We'd never talked before on phone)

We talked for half an hour, discussing how and what of everything. By the time I cut the call, I was shaking and my palms were sweating. He didn't say those words, he didn't ask me that question. Yet it was magical talking to him. We had reached a decision. A decision that we didn't know whether it was a wise one or not. A decision that would not only change our lives but our families lives too forever. It was just a beginning. I had to talk to my parents; he'd a lot of explanation to give to his parents. Getting parental approval seemed like a humongous task. The situation was impossible and logically no parents would say a yes to such a relationship, where the boy and the girl had never seen each other and still claimed mutual love. 

This will throw some light on why KK had to do some manao-ing to his parents (all because of me). 

That was 2 years back. And this is today. What has changed? Perhaps nothing, perhaps a lot. We have realised that our decision, though seemed doubtful and impulsive at that time, was the right one. We have never once regretted it. There are ups and downs, but we have managed them well. Love is deepening, friendship is deeper, respect remains intact. We are still discovering traits in each other. It is fun to find layers in myself and in him. Headiness of love with zing of responsibility, tempering of arguments and a lot of fun thrown in makes an intoxicating concoction. 

2 years later, my waist has become vast; my tummy, earlier size 0 is now shape 0. The weighing scale is screaming for mercy (47 kgs to 65 kgs, is no joke). The clothes shopwala salesman, who never dared to show me stuff above M, now smiles wickedly and says "This is the biggest size available, XXXL" Of course, there's a beautiful reason behind my explosion of size. And that's my Jr. Our Jr. - who brings us closer than where we are right now. 

This day is filled with small memories, surprises, fear, romantic illusions, dreams, ticklish feelings, and so many things that I have not mentioned here. It seems as fresh as everything happened today. I want this feeling to last forever. I may seem like a sappy, romantic lunatic with hearts in my eyes. That's what true love has brought out in me. One right person is all you need to make everything feel like heaven. I have found him and I am proud to have him. 

BTW, in case you are wondering, there's still no sign of candle light dinner, nor has he gone down on his knees, nor has he appeared at the doorstep with a bouquet of roses in his hand. :P (P.S. He did send me roses soon after this chapter, then again for my b'day and then again for V day which falls just 2 days after my b'day)

KK, do I have to tell you that I am in love with you, madly, deeply, immensely?!

I leave you with our romance song which was