I look back

My life turns unexpectedly. I venture into places where I never thought I would. I do things that I wouldn't have thought of doing otherwise. My impulsive decisions have led me to take a totally unexpected kind of route. And these decisions that I speak of are the turning points of my life.

Whatever I have anticipated, thought, expected or decided beforehand, has never turned into reality. I am an indecisive person but when I make my choice, it is made in a split of a second. Thankfully, till date I have never regretted my choices. Some have even called me immature, tried to make me budge from my stance, wanted me to rethink *like any sane person would and should do*... but I have stuck to what I thought was right. Here, I will not deny that I have derailed and have had to compromise for the sake of some people. But I guess everyone does that at some point of their life.

Me and V have been two different kinds - we can be even called opposites in this regard. He's a guy who has his head firmly placed on his shoulder. He knew what he was going to pursue after his SSC. He knew his capabilities, his abilities, his strength, his weakness. He has his career plans chalked out. You ask him where do you see yourself after 10 years; he'll tell his elaborate plans. And you can make out that he has done some serious thinking about it. He's been very meticulous in drawing his life picture.

Being his younger sister most would naturally have thought that I was sure to follow his steps. Have a vision. As far as I'm concerned, I don't even know my evening plans. Let alone plan for the rest of my lifetime. Not that I chose... I was lead to mould myself that way. I strongly believed (I say believed) that I wanted to go for Home Science after my SSC. Just till I got my results in my hand. I'd scored 80%. I told dad I wanted to go for Commerce. I didn't even know what subjects was I going to learn. Parents and V tried to talk me out of it since I "believed" I wanted to do Home Science. I stayed put. And thus, I turned and did not look back.

I opted for French as an optional subject in college, just because I wanted to escape from the "rasva-dirgha" of written Marathi and Hindi. And thanks to the french teacher I vehemently hated the subject by the time I reached FY. Come SY and I made an announcement to my dad- I want to do a course from Alliance Francaise! He asked me the reason and I mumbled something about French in great demand...and so was I let to do what I wanted. The real reason was of course, that one of my friend was learning there and was speaking fairly well. I didn't even know what level of French I wanted to achieve. I thought it was easy and so I took a plunge. No one stopped me this time. But I turned and now I'm happy to look back at it.

I was done with my happy-go-lucky days of BM...and I was still clueless. I thought the song "main aisa kyun hoon" rocked! I hadn't thought about a PG course. I did not want to do CA...after all, I'd passed all my accounting exams after serious rotting. * for those who don't get the idea - Accounts is like Maths... you shouldn't be by-hearting entries* But still thats what i'd done. MCOM? -Yuck who does that? - I said. CS - No booooooooring. MBA? I hadn't prepared for CAT. So was I going to lose a whole year studying for CAT? No, I wasn't. Anyways, parents were not so comfy letting me out of their view, in case I got admission elsewhere other than Pune. So I took the path that I thought would solve my miseries. *I was still doing French from AF since I'd taken breaks to accommodate my TY classes and exams* - I decided I'd do Distance MBA from ICFAI. Dad again asked me why I'd want to do DL MBA. I pushed my French forward and said I W.A.N.T. to complete my Diplome! MBA sucked right from day one. But I still gave it a chance. Again, I turned...and looking back at it, I regret my DL MBA with all my might.

I was now done with French. And it was time I forayed into the job market. This time I'd a faint idea of what I wanted to do. I wanted to be a translator/ interpreter. But I also knew that I wouldn't be achieving it so soon. I had to have some experience working on my French before I saw myself where I wanted to see myself. I was hired at an institute to teach French to students. I was happy at the prospect of being a teacher...it was my childhood dream profession. The money they paid me was lesser than calling it peanuts. I was dangling between two minds - I loved the job... but the pay created a nuisance at home. Mom thought I was putting in more efforts for the money they were offering. I wasn't entirely disagreeing. Soon I started turning down their offers and started taking classes at home. I was content but still, still I was missing something that I didn't want to acknowledge.

Mom tried to talk me into a compromise. Why don't you talk to dad and get a job for yourself. So many of his colleagues/ acquaintances will hire you for may be accounting or some other job? I wasn't against compromising. But I felt dependent and incapable. I did not want my father to find me a job... rather land me into a job. I did not want anyone to say "This girl is Prabhu's daughter.... know Mr. Prabhu who is etc etc in etc etc company" That was like worse than death. I wouldn't even mind if my father told me to apply certain places. But I wanted to do it as an individual Ms. Purnima Prabhu and not as Mr. Prabhu's daughter.

Occasionally, my mother did try to prod the issue. I knew she was genuinely concerned about my inactivity. I could no longer hold my beliefs to myself and keep them suppressed under the blanket of civility. It led to an outburst from me. And the bottom line was "Leave me alone" I was feeling guilty for doing so...but I wasn't ready to accept that I was wrong in not giving in to my parents' concern. I was stubborn and angry. Even my luck wasn't favouring me. I applied in places where my kind of knowledge would help. But I ended up getting no replies. It was worse than being rejected. I was trying and didn't even know if I was failing. I was discouraged and demotivated. Staying at home made me feel guilty and suffocated. This time, I twisted and started doubting my purpose in life...why I existed is what I wanted to know. But I was too numb to feel anything.

As one day I was in an introspective mood wondering where I go next, again I had to confront an advise session. I knew by this time that I was the one who could stir up a hurricane or turn it into something better. I knew I'd to listen because I did not have a solution. Whereas, my insides were still burning and screaming that I wouldn't give in and so I wouldn't give up. I asked for a weeks time and said I'd try my level best to secure my type of job....something that I'd want to do...something that I'd love to do...something that'd give me pleasure and a smile on my face. If that did not happen, I'd bow down to your advice gracefully. Today is thursday and by next one if I do not have anything concrete to tell you, I'll give you a nod.


I contacted every friend on my contact list who could've helped me out. Furiously searched the net day in day out. and before the dead-line, I secured interview dates with 3 companies. I clinged onto my happiness. I hugged my pride. I passed all the 3 interviews. I put a finger on the one that I thought suited me the most. Well, it was a give and take. My job has got nothing to do with French... but neither is it accounting. I'm a content writer and I am content writing.

Know what? All thanks to my blog AND you, my readers and commentors. The interviewers read my blog and were impressed that people read it too.

Yesterday while I was working, I received a call saying they were overjoyed to receive my resume *please note the heavy dose of sarcasm*. That resume which I'd sent to them in November 2008 and hadn't received any reply for. They wanted a french to English translator. I smiled and kicked this opportunity to do what I'm learning to love to do.

Yet again, I turned. But I don't think I compromised. And looking back at it...naaah! I ain't gonna look back at my bad times!

Grrr....Tagged!

Well, ironically, I lay a red carpet for this tag since after I put up my rules for tags, no one tagged me. Sheesh!So, Aparna has been kind enough to pass on the tag that came her way to me and wants to know what are the few things that annoy me.

Annoyance for me are those few things that bring my two eyebrows together and an audible 'tsk tsk'. Doesn't anger me... though it dents my mood for a few seconds to a few minutes. My list here in a random order:

1. Bad Hair days:

I'm a finicky person when it comes to how I look. And the major contributor or should I say the trouble-maker is my hair. I believe in being presentable if not made-up. I don't favour 'just-out-of-the-bed' look at all. And since I have a combination of frizzy and curly hair, having my coiffure as I like it is a herculean task. Grrr!

*And anyone who asks me where I perm my hair - double, triple Grrrrr!*

2. Driving a four-wheeler on one and half-lane-ed road:

In Pune, rickshawalas are the kings of the roads. They own it. But I still can't accept it. The one and half lane-ed road that I talk about is wider than single lane and narrower than double lane. The Emperors will ride their chariots in such a way that it feels forever. Moreover, if I were to overtake from the right, I'd risk a head-on collision from the on-coming traffic.... and if I were to overtake from the left (which I generally avoid), I'd run over a pedestrian.
Grrrr!

3. Drawn curtains:

A major issue at home. It annoys me to no end if I see drawn curtains. And my mom likes them otherwise. According to me, curtains should be drawn only while sleeping. Thats it. I like our house fully-lit, fresh and crisp. Mom draws, I undraw!
Grrrr!

4. Certain ads:

That Hussein-wala lurid Harpic ad that shows a filthy loo, pops up each time I'm having my lunch. And I go 'PIIIIILEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES SWITCH IT OFF'
And the only thing that beats it is Amway ad and its pathetic "isse saaf karo" WC. 'Ewwwww....YUCK! Thats gross!
Grrrr!

5. Over-enthu hosts:

I dread them. Those who enquire about the inane details of my life. They make it their concern if I don't have a boyfriend or if I've changed my shampoo recently!
And I'm even more petrified when they invite for lunch/ dinner. They keep on adding to the already existing pile of food mountain on my plate. 'Enough' and 'no more, thank you.' is naturally unheard of. And since I'm taught not to waste food, I'm often caught between the devil and the deep sea.
Grrrr!

6. Snoopers on my blog:

People come, people read and they leave...just like that. It annoys me with a tinge of sadness. Let me confess, I write for others and for me... and in that order only. If I were to write for a preset group of people, I'd make my blog private, wouldn't I? Blog hoppers I somehow excuse, but there are those who'll come here time and again and leave w/o a single comment. Yes you. You! And you too!!
Grrrr!

7. Parasitical NRIs:

Those who live off India and live-off India - They search for Indian stores abroad and hoard Maggies, ask their dutiful parents to pack Alphanso mangoes, find Indian, homely girls.... and they'll repay it by condemning everything that's related to India. In their fake accents, they'll narrate how their reality shows are superior than the desi version here. I do not disagree totally but the furour in which they defend their country is irritable.
Grrrr!

and a few more....

8. Unclean Bathrooms Grrr!

9. Eternally D-U-H behaviour Grrrr!

10. Loud talkers Grrrr!

I'd love to know what annoys Nitin, Jayded and Shaili. Guys, time to visit the 'create post' once again!

When I was a kid...

1. ...my mom told me that when a milk tooth fell, the only thing that would make it grow back would be more milk. So whenever I drank milk, I made sure I kept it in my mouth for a longer time than necessary because I thought it would solidify itself and I'll have a new tooth instantly. All this to save myself the embarrassment of being asked if rat ate my tooth!


2. ...I thought that the sun dips itself into the sea and renews itself as the moon for the night and v.v. My theory was abandoned as my maternal grandpa told me about the world being round and its rotations and revolutions.


3. ...I got drenched in the rain, ran a high fever+cold+indigestion and I threw up. I promptly asked my mom "MOM, am I pregnant?" Thanks to bollywood movies, I thought getting wet in rains and consequently, puking meant that the female's pregnant. Laugh all you can...my parents did!


4. ...I believed ghosts keep a watch on you everytime. If you were good, they were happy...if you misbehaved, they troubled you at night. So whenever I was naughty, I used to have a twitching feel while going in an unlit room.


5. I wanted to marry Mithun. Mithun Chakraborty, for clarifications. When my mom told me that he'd be an old grandpa by the time I'd be of marriageable age, I said that I didn't mind at all. I guess, afterall, I initiated the trend of marrying older than necessary men. And, FYI, I don't now.

The wait

She subconsciously peered at the mirror that hung all over the plush, suave, white-dominated office. The A/C rhythmically hummed in the background. She tugged at her chignon deciding that it gave her too much of a corporate woman look. Her shiny copper coloured mane swiftly tumbled down her back. She once again consulted the mirror- her crisp off-white shirt and her knee-length maroon coloured skirt; complimented her skin as well as her hair colour.She was finally content.

She clutched at her leather portfolio while her lustrous eyes sought the digital clock silently gulping each minute. She'd been waiting for over two hours now. Biting nails is a dead give-away that you are nervous - she scolded herself grimly. She closed her eyes and lived her dream once again... of being on the top of the world... of reaching dizzying heights... of fame, fortune and goodwill.

'Miss, you are next' came a pleasant music-like instruction. After all it marked the end of her unending wait.

Once in, within 15 minutes, she was convinced that her step had faltered somewhere... that she wasn't going to make it where she wanted to reach... that her dream was but another dream... when the voice in front of her boomed "But, of course... each one makes many compromises during their course of life- whether they like it or not"

And she knew - her wait had just begun!

Bad Girls? Good Girls?

Almost after 7 decades does Archie choose his life partner - Veronica - only to be debated worldwide if his choice has brought more disappointment to Betty or was our freckle-face right in his own terms to blatantly ignore her efforts to make herself "noticed". Whatever the case, it's for sure he's strutting down the aisle with Ms. Lodge. What caught my attention today was a glossy newspaper article that was glorifying Veronicas around the world and more so, the men who kiss their sexily pedicured feet. Seemingly, "bad girls" are the flavour of the season and the "good girls" are as good as obsolete.


I was wondering how true is this paradigm shift? In India? Where the Times Matrimonial has the same standards set for brides "Tall, fair, beautiful, homely". Where the first three qualities are attainable using the money power, I remain skeptical for the 'homely' part. Aren't these THTHHMFs (Too Hot To Handle High Maintenance Females) supposed to be preoccupied about their Maybellines and Chanels and Jimmy Choos and Diors?

My this post wrt those proper bratty, spoilt, rich Veronicas, who wouldn't bat their eyelids if it spells work and average Indian working males, a little better than Prince Andrews.

With egos bigger than their bank balance, these self-indulgent PYTs need men to accessorize them, or so are we made to believe. Ronnie does that, doesn't she? Are men ready to be walked all over by ladies in stilts? Would any self-respecting guy do an Archie, always? - Be at Her Highness' beck and call? I think not. Moreover, "she has him wrapped around her pinky" or even "he dances to her tunes" though humorous are looked upon as derogatory statements.

Surrendering to the charm and sophistication of THTHHMFs would be a short term thing. But keeping the modern day Cleopatra up on the pedestal for the whole lifetime and worshipping her? Sheer utopia! Their "catch me if you can" appeal is lost as soon as caught. But who catches them? Fluttering butterflies are to be admired from a distance. Fantasy items, yes... but your partner for life? a mother to your kids? a support system for the lifetime lows? That's what a guy would look for in his better half and v.v.

No one likes "a hen-pecked husband", not even THTHHMFs... at least they don't want them labelled as one; regardless of the verity. THTHHMFs have their equivalent THTHHMMs (Too Hot To Handle High Maintenance Males) to look after their constant upgradation. Money talks, money rocks!

As per the article "Today, men are opting for bad gals too. They want a dominating partner who lives by her own rules" - guys, lemme know, how true is this?

Curiosity - hasn't killed us - yet!

N! What much to say about her. Half of Singapore thinks we are blood-related sisters, where infact we are sistaars-in-loh. And then they have the whole relation between me, V n N jumbled up. They think V's my husband, N's my sister....V my brother-in-law, N my mother(!!!!) and wot-not.... anyways, thats not what I'm gonna talk about here.

Its me n N, who have worked hard enough for people to get our relations wrongly wired. We bitch, gossip, laugh at the most inappropriate times, chatter, keep a look out for sales, exchange Tees, look for confirmation at each other that we are NOT fat... and many more things. And the biggest thing between us is we cannot keep our mouths shut from each other. What happens here has to reach there and v.v. So here's what happens in most cases. Psssst, did I mention she craves for madness as much as I do?


'u callin me piggie? :' started N

'when i called u piigie? :O'

'see last sentence hahahahahaa aaaaaaaaaaahaha'

'arre i closed thwe window... copy paste'

'oh...u said suar....boo hoo'

'HAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAA that is "sure" in rustic way'

' "tell them to check... suar"
yeah...ahahaha .... ask me tmrw menu re

'what tom'

'che che'

'i'm gng to blog this'

'haplease'

'yes yes edited version'

'no no'

'muhahahaha'

'i am signin off then'

'whatever we talked u'll see'

' ok allright' *Thus me gets the unwanted permission*

'tell S, his marriage Jevan was excellent...yesterday his amma had called'

'okies...what said'

'nothing they came bk to old house since new house furniture happening....but will be shiftin there n renting old house'

'gud gud...i gotta tell u yahan ki kahani....but will wait till nxt weekend'

'abt who what ..tell tell...gimme a hint'

'my pota puggid* with it already' *For non-Konks, it means I'm dying to tell this/ I'm dying to know.*

'S and wife'

':O Already??? tell tell no plis plis'

'yeah... talked 5 hrs with her on fone in 2 days'

'who?'

' me and J'

':O what u talked soooo much?'

'u know She is june 82.... only 1.5yrs elder...'

' :O big big'

'N... TALKED ABOUT S... FMLY AND EVERYTHIN HAPPENIN HERE RIGHT NOW'

'WHY EVERYTHING IN CAPS???.....SOMETHING SCANDALOUS?'

'by mistake'

'sheessh.....i was expecting....scandalous newses'

'S is dumber by the day ...i almost feel like wriniging his neck tmrw'

'Don't don't'

'dont blog this ok'

'he's just married think abt J
hehe i will
names will be hidden'

'uska sochke i feel like wringing'

' u see how i edit stuff'

'got loads to tell man...'

'you have Nm and Sb email id...i gotta share it via email'

' yup...what what
what what'

'pics of j n b'

'what what j n b?'

'jandoo n bagga'

'oh my...'

No, it didn't just end there. There was more, lots more infact. We are a pair of curious cats. :)

Frendz m'am?

All of you know Orkut, right? All of you also know *specially gurls* what kind of friendship requests we get? Taking a peak into some of the award-winning requests I got and the replies I'd have loved to give if I'd permitted myself to a little nastiness. Promise, I ain't making them up. I save them into my Gmail draft section. *I've hell lot of time to kill*

And so....

The II Runner-up:

he ihwana be friend?hhm wat u say?hmmm
A. hmmmmm...hmmmmmm ......hhhhhmmmmmmm....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!


The I Runner-up:

Hi, I am SB from Mumbai - Peddar Road, as of now you don’t know me, I have send a Friends request to you long back, but dint hear from you, so thought let me give a small Intro about my self….So I am S - Born and brought up in Mumbai, after traveling across the entire world on various International Assignments, right now based in Pune, as Regional Head of an MNC for West India, just moved to Pune some 2 Months back..So that about me mam. So that’s a small description of me, now can we be friends mam !!!

A. uhhh... is this your introduction for a matrimonial site? If it is, I'll say, no girl in her senses will not NOT laugh at such puke-able English of yours. Get yourself a tutor first and call her Ma'am!


The Winner: *Request*

HELLO THIS IS XXXXXX FRM GUJARAT (KUTCH) I AM 36 YRS OLD AND MARRIED I AM BUSINESS MEN I M VERY MUCH

A. I ain't deaf... so please DO NOT SHOUT! You are 36(!!!!!!!) yrs, OLD AND MARRIED! How should that interest me? There's one thing though, that catches my fancy : You are plural?? and rightly said, you do a lot of much-much. Excooz me!


The Winner : *Reply*

hiiiiii, this iss Rahul.....naam toh suna hoga. add me plaese!

(All the shreya goes to Rayshma for the following brilliant come back)

A. yeah.. there are millions of you!
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Despos, really! How they make us giddy with giggles! :P