Candid, not Candied

Friday, 27 August 2010

My Rakhi Gift for this year is...

Dear V,

It's not like the old times, when we were under the same roof... I fought with you even on Raksha bandhan day and swore not to talk to you ever. Today we live in different continents, lead different lives. I have to calculate the time before I can pick up the phone and give you a call. Though I love my new life, I miss the old one. 

Will always be there for you, no matter what!



Friday, 6 August 2010

Name Game

Have you come across funny surnames? I know, it is considered bad manners - making fun of names, surnames etc. Debate-able, touchy issues those are! However, I have come across some classic surnames and classic-er alliances of such surnames.

You might be knowing the joke which goes like - What's the name of the guy with 3 knees? Nitin
What's the surname of the guy with 6 knees? - Sahani. What's the full name of guy with 9 knees? Nitin Sahani. Well, something like that.

My area for this post is mainly restricted to (majority of) Maharashtrian surnames, since the obvious fact that I have lived my whole life in MH. I hope Maharashtrian bandhu- bhaginis will take this lightly... with a pinch of salt. And for those extra sensitive ones, I highly recommend a bowlful of salt. After all, I don't want ANY jumpy Maharashtrian Manoos to feel insulted and then spam my comments section with hate mails and brickbats and lecture and etc. and etc.

Often I have teased V. "What if our surname was 'Nayak'?" - I would ask. Then in the same breath I'd say "Then your name would be Vinayak Nayak". I relentlessly continued "What if our surname was 'Nayak' and our Dad's name started with a 'V'? Then your name would be Vinayak V. Nayak... that's like calling your name twice!!"

I just couldn't stop there, for I continued "What if my name was 'Prabha'? Then I would be 'Prabha Prabhu'. :D "And then what if our dad's name was Prabhakar? Then I would be 'Prabha Prabhakar Prabhu'?" :D

There are safe surnames and there are volatile ones. The latter ones can make you range from a chuckle to a full throated laughter. Sometimes I wonder how they live with such ones. Not ashamed maybe, but admit it, they do tend to fall on the funnier side. I mean, what do you think of Potdukhe (roughly meaning stomach ache), Tupe (Ghee), Hirwe (Green), Takle (bald), Phatak (gate), Dahibhate (curd rice) etc?

Imagine marriages of such families. In fact, I got thinking when recently there was a marriage at our neighbour's place. Their surname is 'Kurkure' and the bride's side was 'TaLele'. When we went to attend the marriage, I couldn't stop giggling; for the board read 'TaLele & Kurkure' which means Fried Crispy! That's what I call a perfect alliance.

Some more perfect matches as below ::

Imagine the groom's surname as 'Wagh - Tiger' and the bride's surname as 'Waghmare - Tiger Hunter' :D

Imagine the groom's surname as 'Gupchup - the silent ones' and the bride's 'Badbade - The talkitive'. :D

Imagine the groom's surname as 'Kale - Black' and the bride's 'Gore - Fair'. The children hence become Grey? :D

Imagine the groom's surname 'Dhere - big, fat stomach' and the bride's 'Potphode - someone who'll burst the stomach' :D

Imagine the groom's surname 'Sakhardande - sugar candy' and the bride's 'Tikhe - Chilly hot' :D

Imagine the groom's surname 'Kate - Thorn' and the bride's 'Phule - Flowers'. Would her name after marriage be 'Phul aur Kaate'? :D

Then there are parts of the body - 'Doke - The head', 'Mane - the neck' and of course, our very own GSB surname 'Pai - the foot'

And then there are those who manhandle the body parts 'Kanpile - the one who twists ears' and 'Paitode - the leg breaker'

Hey what if there is an intercaste marriage between 'Pai' and 'Paitode'??

And then there are the intellectuals too. 'Vichare - the thinker' and 'Shahane - the intelligent'

And the humans that don't sound like one 'Gaitonde - face of cow', 'Kolhe - the fox', 'Landge - the wolf'

And the metal lovers 'Tambe - copper man', 'Lokhande - Iron man', 'Pitale - Brass man', 'Sonar - Goldsmith', 'Lohar - Blacksmith'...

I hope, by now you are done with your bowlful of salt. Is there more to it? Add on if you know some interesting ones. Will add them here.


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