Candid, not Candied

Friday, 6 August 2010

Name Game

Have you come across funny surnames? I know, it is considered bad manners - making fun of names, surnames etc. Debate-able, touchy issues those are! However, I have come across some classic surnames and classic-er alliances of such surnames.

You might be knowing the joke which goes like - What's the name of the guy with 3 knees? Nitin
What's the surname of the guy with 6 knees? - Sahani. What's the full name of guy with 9 knees? Nitin Sahani. Well, something like that.

My area for this post is mainly restricted to (majority of) Maharashtrian surnames, since the obvious fact that I have lived my whole life in MH. I hope Maharashtrian bandhu- bhaginis will take this lightly... with a pinch of salt. And for those extra sensitive ones, I highly recommend a bowlful of salt. After all, I don't want ANY jumpy Maharashtrian Manoos to feel insulted and then spam my comments section with hate mails and brickbats and lecture and etc. and etc.

Often I have teased V. "What if our surname was 'Nayak'?" - I would ask. Then in the same breath I'd say "Then your name would be Vinayak Nayak". I relentlessly continued "What if our surname was 'Nayak' and our Dad's name started with a 'V'? Then your name would be Vinayak V. Nayak... that's like calling your name twice!!"

I just couldn't stop there, for I continued "What if my name was 'Prabha'? Then I would be 'Prabha Prabhu'. :D "And then what if our dad's name was Prabhakar? Then I would be 'Prabha Prabhakar Prabhu'?" :D

There are safe surnames and there are volatile ones. The latter ones can make you range from a chuckle to a full throated laughter. Sometimes I wonder how they live with such ones. Not ashamed maybe, but admit it, they do tend to fall on the funnier side. I mean, what do you think of Potdukhe (roughly meaning stomach ache), Tupe (Ghee), Hirwe (Green), Takle (bald), Phatak (gate), Dahibhate (curd rice) etc?

Imagine marriages of such families. In fact, I got thinking when recently there was a marriage at our neighbour's place. Their surname is 'Kurkure' and the bride's side was 'TaLele'. When we went to attend the marriage, I couldn't stop giggling; for the board read 'TaLele & Kurkure' which means Fried Crispy! That's what I call a perfect alliance.

Some more perfect matches as below ::

Imagine the groom's surname as 'Wagh - Tiger' and the bride's surname as 'Waghmare - Tiger Hunter' :D

Imagine the groom's surname as 'Gupchup - the silent ones' and the bride's 'Badbade - The talkitive'. :D

Imagine the groom's surname as 'Kale - Black' and the bride's 'Gore - Fair'. The children hence become Grey? :D

Imagine the groom's surname 'Dhere - big, fat stomach' and the bride's 'Potphode - someone who'll burst the stomach' :D

Imagine the groom's surname 'Sakhardande - sugar candy' and the bride's 'Tikhe - Chilly hot' :D

Imagine the groom's surname 'Kate - Thorn' and the bride's 'Phule - Flowers'. Would her name after marriage be 'Phul aur Kaate'? :D

Then there are parts of the body - 'Doke - The head', 'Mane - the neck' and of course, our very own GSB surname 'Pai - the foot'

And then there are those who manhandle the body parts 'Kanpile - the one who twists ears' and 'Paitode - the leg breaker'

Hey what if there is an intercaste marriage between 'Pai' and 'Paitode'??

And then there are the intellectuals too. 'Vichare - the thinker' and 'Shahane - the intelligent'

And the humans that don't sound like one 'Gaitonde - face of cow', 'Kolhe - the fox', 'Landge - the wolf'

And the metal lovers 'Tambe - copper man', 'Lokhande - Iron man', 'Pitale - Brass man', 'Sonar - Goldsmith', 'Lohar - Blacksmith'...

I hope, by now you are done with your bowlful of salt. Is there more to it? Add on if you know some interesting ones. Will add them here.


  1. BRILLIANT! I bow to thee. You are capable of more nonsense than me. And the icing on the cake was that I found half of my college profs' surnames up there in your post. Was rolling on the floor through the post :P

  2. Living in Pune I have known people with all these surnames and had a good laugh reading your post :D You have captured the humor of these surnames very nicely in your writing!

  3. @ Tamanna,

    hey welcome here! I thank you for bearing my nonsense. :) Glad to know you enjoyed my post.

    @ Supriya,
    Thanks a lot!

  4. haha... this was awesome... It reminded me of a fwd sms I came across a few years back (don't want to mention as it is a bit offensive). Nicely written purnima, can't beat you there.

  5. Namrata :

    awww.. we don't mind reproduction of SMS-es here. *however offensive they may be* ;).. Thanks!

  6. pune has it's own unique share of random names, i think! but then, i love snooping on friends profiles on FB just to see the weird names people have!

  7. This is my first visit here.
    Very interesting.

  8. Nice one. I actually have a cousin called Vinayak Nayak!

  9. Thank you, Mr. Chowla! and welcome here.

    @ Aparna,
    oww, please don't tell him about my blog here. ;) and a warm welcome to you too!

  10. hehehe...good one..
    jokes about "do die do" are done to death too..have a friend with that surname..btw, me lived in MH for a good part of my life!

  11. Uma: Awesome! Good to know you are from MY side of the world! :)


Go on, say it! I will not sue you... pinky promise!


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