A while back I read this and I couldn't agree more.
Love is so mis-defined nowadays. It is a must-have trend and time pass for many young people. I sound old and aunty-ish when I say this. But love, certainly has lost its meaning and is easily replaceable.
I have always interpreted love as commitment, honor, respect, trust and communication. I have also believed throughout my teenage and later that I can love only one person. For me, it was never so fickle to be played around with. Love, for me, holds many emotions.
People take foolish steps in name of love. And then they conveniently call it blind. In my opinion, love is never blind. Its you who categorically ignore all the defects and pot holes only to dig them up later and regret. I know couple who fell in love, got married and had had problems. Not just adjustment hitches. They were big time problems that created a rift between the two of them. When you actually see what went wrong, you can see the problem lay much before the matrimonial ties.
Love is never bringing flowers and chocolates. It is not hugs and kisses and tons of I love you notes. It is not remembering birthdays and anniversaries only for bringing gifts. It is all that too, but in the back drop. Mainly, when you say you love someone, you should be capable enough to make it work through difficulties, which requires commitment and responsible attitude. If you want to take your love to marriage and kids and further lifelong togetherness then it is your responsibility to stock take your abilities to get through thick and thin.
The word "love" has become so shallow. Everyone uses it and throws it around. All you need is a boy to give a girl a red rose and they think they are "in love". Not that they may not be, but hardly a few of them stick to each other and mature their love. Most cases, one fight and it all starts falling apart like a house of cards. Today, we see many college students with arm candies, feeding chocolates to each other, looking deeply into each others eyes, pushing and pulling lovingly - I wonder how many of them do really understand "love". Or maybe it is just a fling that they never intended to take further. I, for one, have never been comfortable to play around with emotions and let it go as if nothing happened at all.
I am not saying everything is rosy good with a couple in love. There are times when we don't see eye to eye. There are times when mistakes are made and there is some resentment. All that stays for sometime, but you always got to keep the bigger picture in mind. It is necessary to know that you are answerable to your other half and vice versa. Its not my ego v/s yours. It is about taking the correct route out of the mess, be it mine, be it yours.
It is cute to be serenaded once in a while. It is cuter to get an expensive gift. But only once in a while. Love is not made up of superficial things like these, though they add to its glamor.
Many a times, I used to be asked "What is your idea of romance?"
Today, I say small gestures are romantic enough. You don't need the ambience, nor do you require a date that is super expensive. I find it really romantic when after a pot luck party at our house, KK pitches in to clean the kitchen without me having to ask him to do so.
It is romantic when he tells me, in response to my "what to make for dinner?", "Let's just grab whatever's left in the fridge."
It is up to you to see the romance in daily life instead of seeking it in surprise dates and gifts. It lies in understanding the difficulties your partner must be going through. Romance shows up in least expected situations. It is our duty to keep our eyes and hearts open to receive it.
No one teaches you this stuff, a little common sense, a little maturity and a little patience takes you a long way.