All this while I have been disregarding the fact that one of my childhood best friends, Shraddha, is now married and will go elsewhere to be with her better half... start a new life. Today while online, she breaks the news to me. Visa approved, I'm leaving next weekend, the chat read. Instantly I felt a pang in me. It is very difficult to say what I felt.
Tejaswini, Shraddha and Purnima. We have always been THE three gals always seen together. I don't even know how long we have been friends. It was way back in the 90s. All three of us in hideous frilly frocks, mis matching hairbands and sandals, but friendship so solid that our parents had to pull us apart whenever we met at some GSB functions. Then, we'd never had enough of playing hide n seek with each other. Now, we still haven't had enough of each others' company.
We ONLY met during GSB functions when we were kids. We weren't in the same school. nor did we live in same area that we could visit each other often. Even after SSC we went in for different streams. Tejaswini- Science, Shraddha - arts and me - commerce. Three different colleges. Three different dreams. But still there was our friendship that remained. Cell phones changed our lives. Orkut and G chats embellished it further. now we were just a click away from each other and our mothers had to pull us away from our respective PCs. Such were our chat histories. We talked about inane stuff, bitched about "supposed-to-be-stud" guys on Orkut, swapped news about everything n nothing, crashed in on others' scrapbooks, spied on snaps and found out true stories, declared ourselves better that FBI...
There came a point in life when parents got serious about marriage stuff. We three were told that we were supposedly of "marriageable age". We revolted. We screamed, shouted and supported each others' opinion that we ARE still kids and we WON'T get married.
Slowly, we had to accept the fact that parents won't let us off the hook. Indeed it is time to take a new look at life. We started teasing each other... you first... NO you first.. I'm younger than you... Tu badi hai re...teri pehle honi chahiye... shaadi main bula kya...we'll come for free khaana...
Finally there came a day when Shrads announced that she'll soon be committed and married within 20 days flat. and that she will be flying to Germany. It didn't register. ... I attended her marriage... it still didn't register. I met her after marriage and teased her to the point that she was embarrassed.. it still didn't register.
However, today she says, she's going away... It hits hard. I had a lump in my throat that wouldn't go away. I couldn't even talk to Tejaswini about it, because she was stating the obvious. All of us are having the same feeling. It feels like someones burnt a hole in my heart.
Today tis Shrads, tomorrow tis gonna be TJ... after that it'll be Pallavi... one fine day, it'll be me. Life's just not fair! I have complained soo many times and it still stares back at me. Mom tried convincing me, consoling me, scolding me. But the sinking feeling doesn't go away. I wish I could hold back my time.... capture it and keep it safe for no one to take it away from me.
Shrads, we know you are gonna have a wonderful life with Hrishikesh. He'll take good care of you... Wherever you are, remember that there are 2 MAD girls in LOVE with you, who'll miss you. Tis never gonna be same for me n TJ.
I hate posting this.