My teacher once said " We never live in our present. We live either in our past or we worry about the future."
How true is that statement!
Just a while ago, I was feeling despondent that my life at mom's place is over. I was reminiscing my carefree life then. My mom allowed me to sleep till late in the morning. I totally miss that perk now. In fact, I need it badly. Those ready made cool coffee, hot breakfast and endless talks with mom - I miss them.
Just then a thought passed my mind, what if I'd I had never married? then probably I'd be dreaming about a married life and a family. And that's what I have now.
I may be close to thirty but I still crave for my parents. I have learnt to walk but I do look back once in a while to see my folks are still there to hold me if I fall.
Am I selfish? Because I despite my vulnerabilities, I do not want to go back to my old life. It is pretty paradoxical there.
So there, I am ruminating about the past. In all this time travelling, I ignored the fact that i spent a wonderful day today. Now I think about it!!!
Hoping to learn and live for today.
P.S. Blogathon's done for the year. :) :( will take some time off from the blog for now. I am not disappearing. Will be just round the block. See ya soon. ;)
Showing posts with label Blogathon 2. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Blogathon 2. Show all posts
Friday, 31 August 2012
Thursday, 30 August 2012
Day 30 :: Reason for feeling alive and tired
Today was one of the days when you truly feel alive. Well nothing out of the ordinary. It was just a normal routine day, just that Aa is getting active by the day and naughty may I add?!
Now since she is used to me for the majority of the day, she screams even if I enter the kitchen to pour myself some coffee. She plays silently if I am sitting there, right next to her. If not, the banshee sounds. As a solution, I ask my mom to be online and video chat for the whole morning (which is comfortably after dinner time for her).
Aa's started to crawl and I don't blame her for wanting to explore every nook and cranny. From the day she started rolling over, I have been dreaming of seeing her crawl. And to whoever I mentioned this dream of mine would say "Just watch your words."
I feel like eating my words! It is wonderful to see her mobile but when I have to cook and clean and sundry, it makes me tear my hair. She loves the wires, chargers, cable, telephone, anything.
So today was one such day. Each time I moved away from her, she lunged towards the laptop or the cell phone or the wires or the sliding table and I had to come running to pick her and relocate the girl, only to repeat the procedure again. And again. And again. It really got to me today! Mommy was having a time of her life looking at her daughter's daughter trouble her daughter as such.
I take it back if it sounded like a complaint. I am so looking forward to another day, where Aa makes me run and turns me mad.
That's the thing about kiddos. No matter what, you fall in love with them.
P.S. Been long since I posted some good pictures of my darling. Will do it soon. ;)
Now since she is used to me for the majority of the day, she screams even if I enter the kitchen to pour myself some coffee. She plays silently if I am sitting there, right next to her. If not, the banshee sounds. As a solution, I ask my mom to be online and video chat for the whole morning (which is comfortably after dinner time for her).
Aa's started to crawl and I don't blame her for wanting to explore every nook and cranny. From the day she started rolling over, I have been dreaming of seeing her crawl. And to whoever I mentioned this dream of mine would say "Just watch your words."
I feel like eating my words! It is wonderful to see her mobile but when I have to cook and clean and sundry, it makes me tear my hair. She loves the wires, chargers, cable, telephone, anything.
So today was one such day. Each time I moved away from her, she lunged towards the laptop or the cell phone or the wires or the sliding table and I had to come running to pick her and relocate the girl, only to repeat the procedure again. And again. And again. It really got to me today! Mommy was having a time of her life looking at her daughter's daughter trouble her daughter as such.
I take it back if it sounded like a complaint. I am so looking forward to another day, where Aa makes me run and turns me mad.
That's the thing about kiddos. No matter what, you fall in love with them.
P.S. Been long since I posted some good pictures of my darling. Will do it soon. ;)
Wednesday, 29 August 2012
Day 29 :: I'm almost there
It's almost time to wrap up my Blogathon of this year. I don't want my last post to be concluding one, so this one just jumps in now.
Doing the Blogathon was a biiig decision. But I still wanted to go ahead with it. It was a self imposed challenge. It seems very easy and doable at first, and I fairly had an idea of most if the posts that I wanted to include. However, what I blindly assumed was that I'll have plenty of time to sit in peace and at ease as before. I took for granted that nothing could go wrong.
The main obstacle in this whole event was that my lappy's screen's gone kaput. Now connecting the unit to the tv and enabling wireless keyboard and mouse was not such a great task as was trying to keep Aa away from the whole set up.
We hence decided that I would do the posts while KK took Aa out for a walk. Now, I have married a Software Engineer; it is unethical that I even presume that my baby will be taken out everyday.
Since that was not happening, I had to blog when Aa retired for the day. This usually happens with her on my lap, just like right now. Thank god for Apple products!
I am not as satisfied with my Blogathon this year as I was with the previous one. I like to take my time thinking and writing and rewriting my stuff until I am satisfied with it. This time it wasn't so. I had to try and get it in first shot, which I don't think I have succeeded each time. :(
I haven't been able to reply to the comments lately. I shall hopefully do it soon. I do not like ignoring any comment.
KK has been very very supportive and I couldn't have thought of doing this without him. Frankly, once my parents went, I had cold feet. I wanted to back off and say a timid bye to my commitment. That obviously didn't happen, all thanks to the husband.
I am happy that I am seeing the end of this month long journey. It was a pleasure and pain too! :) But that doesn't mean I am not doing one next year. I most certainly am willing to.
See you tomorrow. Two more to go!
Doing the Blogathon was a biiig decision. But I still wanted to go ahead with it. It was a self imposed challenge. It seems very easy and doable at first, and I fairly had an idea of most if the posts that I wanted to include. However, what I blindly assumed was that I'll have plenty of time to sit in peace and at ease as before. I took for granted that nothing could go wrong.
The main obstacle in this whole event was that my lappy's screen's gone kaput. Now connecting the unit to the tv and enabling wireless keyboard and mouse was not such a great task as was trying to keep Aa away from the whole set up.
We hence decided that I would do the posts while KK took Aa out for a walk. Now, I have married a Software Engineer; it is unethical that I even presume that my baby will be taken out everyday.
Since that was not happening, I had to blog when Aa retired for the day. This usually happens with her on my lap, just like right now. Thank god for Apple products!
I am not as satisfied with my Blogathon this year as I was with the previous one. I like to take my time thinking and writing and rewriting my stuff until I am satisfied with it. This time it wasn't so. I had to try and get it in first shot, which I don't think I have succeeded each time. :(
I haven't been able to reply to the comments lately. I shall hopefully do it soon. I do not like ignoring any comment.
KK has been very very supportive and I couldn't have thought of doing this without him. Frankly, once my parents went, I had cold feet. I wanted to back off and say a timid bye to my commitment. That obviously didn't happen, all thanks to the husband.
I am happy that I am seeing the end of this month long journey. It was a pleasure and pain too! :) But that doesn't mean I am not doing one next year. I most certainly am willing to.
See you tomorrow. Two more to go!
Tuesday, 28 August 2012
Day 28 :: Throwing Out the "In-laws"
Scandalous, I know! ;)
Relations become complicated when "in-laws" follow the words mother, father, brother or sister. Often they are considered secondary, for all the natural reasons. Blood is thicker than water. A daughter in law can never replace a daughter, or a father in law can never hold the same place in your heart as your father.
That said, it is not impossible to bring the ties any closer. Most marriageable girls are vary of their in-laws. So was I. Getting married and going to another household was such an imaginable nightmare for me!
In our society, everyone expects the girl tomake most of the adjustments and compromises. No one bothers to think that the girl requires some time to get out of the mental shock of being married and catapulted into a sea of new people. All a girl needs at such times is a lot of understanding and loving words to convey that she is in good hands.
When I met my in laws for the first time, for all the understandable reasons, I was a nervous wreck. The almost engagement ceremony came to an end and we went to see them off, when my (then) would be father in law says "Dear, do come to visit us,. You are always welcome there."
When we did go after a few days, I was feeling odd sitting in their house. Again my father in law, sensing my discomfort says, "Go ahead dear. See your home. It's all yours now."
That instant I felt the ice melt in me. There was this warmth of being accepted. But still there was this spike in mind, I was not yet married. People are known to be extra kind before marriage and the scene changes drastically afterwards. Yes, I am a suspicious woman that way.
Not so soon after, I was to live with my in laws in my pregnant days. That was the time I got to bond with them closely that too without KK in the vicinity. The day KK went back to the US, mother in law said "Please don't hesitate to ask me for anything. If you feel like eating anything or if you need anything, ask freely. Think of me as your mother." I was already in tears but this statement teared me up freshly.
Since then there was no looking back. I found them easy to talk to. I have shared jokes with my father in law like I never thought I could. I found a younger sister in my sister in law who chose me to unburden all her worries. She was fun and mostly proved to be a cusion in the initial days of my stay there. And my mother in law, although is soft spoken and seems naive can make me a victim of a real naughty comment when least expected.
I cannot think of replacing them with my own parents or my sibling but they hold equal importance, love and respect in my heart.
Me, I couldn't possibly think of throwing out the "in laws" part in these relations, But I have certainly come close.
Relations become complicated when "in-laws" follow the words mother, father, brother or sister. Often they are considered secondary, for all the natural reasons. Blood is thicker than water. A daughter in law can never replace a daughter, or a father in law can never hold the same place in your heart as your father.
That said, it is not impossible to bring the ties any closer. Most marriageable girls are vary of their in-laws. So was I. Getting married and going to another household was such an imaginable nightmare for me!
In our society, everyone expects the girl tomake most of the adjustments and compromises. No one bothers to think that the girl requires some time to get out of the mental shock of being married and catapulted into a sea of new people. All a girl needs at such times is a lot of understanding and loving words to convey that she is in good hands.
When I met my in laws for the first time, for all the understandable reasons, I was a nervous wreck. The almost engagement ceremony came to an end and we went to see them off, when my (then) would be father in law says "Dear, do come to visit us,. You are always welcome there."
When we did go after a few days, I was feeling odd sitting in their house. Again my father in law, sensing my discomfort says, "Go ahead dear. See your home. It's all yours now."
That instant I felt the ice melt in me. There was this warmth of being accepted. But still there was this spike in mind, I was not yet married. People are known to be extra kind before marriage and the scene changes drastically afterwards. Yes, I am a suspicious woman that way.
Not so soon after, I was to live with my in laws in my pregnant days. That was the time I got to bond with them closely that too without KK in the vicinity. The day KK went back to the US, mother in law said "Please don't hesitate to ask me for anything. If you feel like eating anything or if you need anything, ask freely. Think of me as your mother." I was already in tears but this statement teared me up freshly.
Since then there was no looking back. I found them easy to talk to. I have shared jokes with my father in law like I never thought I could. I found a younger sister in my sister in law who chose me to unburden all her worries. She was fun and mostly proved to be a cusion in the initial days of my stay there. And my mother in law, although is soft spoken and seems naive can make me a victim of a real naughty comment when least expected.
I cannot think of replacing them with my own parents or my sibling but they hold equal importance, love and respect in my heart.
Me, I couldn't possibly think of throwing out the "in laws" part in these relations, But I have certainly come close.
Monday, 27 August 2012
Day 27 :: Don't You Dare
This incident took place on shuttle bus from the aircraft to terminal at the Mumbai airport.
I was 6.5 months pregnant then. Naturally I got a place to sit, while the husband was standing beside me. The lady next to me noticed the tattoo.
"You are 'Purnima'?" she asked.
I nodded a yes.
"Can I take a closer look at it, if you don't mind?"
Husband nodded a yes.
"Can I touch it?"
Husband put forth his arm. (bear in mind the tattoo was still raw and the arm was swollen)
"Did it pain a lot?" - lady
"Not much." - husband
"Are you very happy he did that for you?" she turned to me.
"I really respect his feelings but I don't like to think about the pain he'd to endure."
"What does your mother in law have to say about this?"
"Umm, nothing. She didn't say anything."
"She must hate you."
"????"
"I am a mother myself. And I am thinking from a mother's point of view. I couldn't bear it if my son had to undergo such pain."
"Umm...!!!!"
"Look, your husband must love you a lot to do that for you. He does! You should not hurt him ever in your life. Never ever! Do you get that?"
"???!!!"
I was flabbergasted. Some unknown lady and she lectures the pregnant me. But she wasn't wrong. KK loves me a lot and he doesn't need a tattoo to tell me that. (although having one gives me thrills)
I was 6.5 months pregnant then. Naturally I got a place to sit, while the husband was standing beside me. The lady next to me noticed the tattoo.
"You are 'Purnima'?" she asked.
I nodded a yes.
"Can I take a closer look at it, if you don't mind?"
Husband nodded a yes.
"Can I touch it?"
Husband put forth his arm. (bear in mind the tattoo was still raw and the arm was swollen)
"Did it pain a lot?" - lady
"Not much." - husband
"Are you very happy he did that for you?" she turned to me.
"I really respect his feelings but I don't like to think about the pain he'd to endure."
"What does your mother in law have to say about this?"
"Umm, nothing. She didn't say anything."
"She must hate you."
"????"
"I am a mother myself. And I am thinking from a mother's point of view. I couldn't bear it if my son had to undergo such pain."
"Umm...!!!!"
"Look, your husband must love you a lot to do that for you. He does! You should not hurt him ever in your life. Never ever! Do you get that?"
"???!!!"
I was flabbergasted. Some unknown lady and she lectures the pregnant me. But she wasn't wrong. KK loves me a lot and he doesn't need a tattoo to tell me that. (although having one gives me thrills)
Sunday, 26 August 2012
Saturday, 25 August 2012
Day 25 :: I am not sorry
A few of my blog readers say that I am too direct sometimes. And that u write about anything and anyone and also that they have to be careful with me, else they'll too land up as one of my blogposts.
I totally agree! I do write about people in my daily life. Whether good or bad I do not hesitate to mention them in my blogposts if I find them worthy of a mention.
The idea behind all this is not to criticize or belittle. It's just that when I undergo a situation or am subject to after effects if human behavior, I find it interesting enough to share. The intention is to share an experience... The intention is to invite other people's view and angle.
Yes, I do at times tend to demean and pass a wry comment, and if I said it was not to send across a message, I'd be lying!
This page is open for anyone to read. This is certainly not "talking behind backs" or even being dead rude. I have a fair idea if who reads my blog and I fairly do not have any idea who else reads my blogs. If the person I have written about comes and reads and understands it is about him/ her, let him/ her come and ask me. I am ready with my answers. I do not write unless I am sure about what I want to write.
Of late, I realized that spreading negativity by writing something negative is not good- not for me and least for any reader. But that doesn't mean negative stuff doesn't happen to you at all? It eases the mind to share things and unload a bit. It really soothes when someone says "Hey, that happened to me too."
I am responsible for what I put down in this blog and I maintain my stand. I will never throw in something that is insulting to anyone intentionally.
I do not feel sorry for speaking my mind which is often the case on my blog. The other day KK read one of my blog posts and said "Are you really writing all that??!"
In my defense - Everyone has their opinions. I have mine too. Although, not every opinion has a place. Mine do, in this blog! ;)
I totally agree! I do write about people in my daily life. Whether good or bad I do not hesitate to mention them in my blogposts if I find them worthy of a mention.
The idea behind all this is not to criticize or belittle. It's just that when I undergo a situation or am subject to after effects if human behavior, I find it interesting enough to share. The intention is to share an experience... The intention is to invite other people's view and angle.
Yes, I do at times tend to demean and pass a wry comment, and if I said it was not to send across a message, I'd be lying!
This page is open for anyone to read. This is certainly not "talking behind backs" or even being dead rude. I have a fair idea if who reads my blog and I fairly do not have any idea who else reads my blogs. If the person I have written about comes and reads and understands it is about him/ her, let him/ her come and ask me. I am ready with my answers. I do not write unless I am sure about what I want to write.
Of late, I realized that spreading negativity by writing something negative is not good- not for me and least for any reader. But that doesn't mean negative stuff doesn't happen to you at all? It eases the mind to share things and unload a bit. It really soothes when someone says "Hey, that happened to me too."
I am responsible for what I put down in this blog and I maintain my stand. I will never throw in something that is insulting to anyone intentionally.
I do not feel sorry for speaking my mind which is often the case on my blog. The other day KK read one of my blog posts and said "Are you really writing all that??!"
In my defense - Everyone has their opinions. I have mine too. Although, not every opinion has a place. Mine do, in this blog! ;)
Friday, 24 August 2012
Day 24 :: Latest from Aa world
We know that every child meets its milestone at its own pace. Even then it is difficult not to compare baby achievements.
When I saw Avi, My friend Shweta's kiddo, sit unsupported when he was mere 6 months old, I was surprised! Aa was not even close. I wondered how long will she take to sit. She has started sitting unsupported since 15 days now. Since then, I have seen huge developments in her activities. I think she is undergoing growth spurts.
She understands a lot more than she did a fortnight back. A slightly high pitched "NO" and she stops in her tracks to the wires. She associates voice with the person; can recognise lullabys from reprimands; screams in my absence; cries when a toy she is playing with, is taken away from her.
And physically too, she is pacing up. She sat, rocked and crawled (like full lenghts without falling) within 2-3 days. Now she finds sitting and crawling boring, so she holds me for support and stands up!! And here I was wondering when she will sit. In a blink of an eye she has done all this.
She is getting verbal too. Since yesterday she has started to make more meaningful sounds, not just gurgles. She started repeating "bababababababa" and "papapapapapa" all of a sudden yesterday evening! When we repeated the same to her, she found it immensly funny and burst into peels of laughter. Would have loved to upload the same. Maybe tomorrow.
I am sure all the babies are as smart and must be doing the same thing world wide. But that's the thing about your "own" baby, anything it does, you find it fascinating and boast worthy. Every parent feels proud of his/ her child's milestones. Hell, it is exciting even if it poops a different colour one day!
I am proud! Yes. Very. Very. Very!
However tired I may be, I look forward to the next day. Waiting for Aa to do something new, make a new face, try a new trick.
Aa, mommy looooooooooves you! Muah!
When I saw Avi, My friend Shweta's kiddo, sit unsupported when he was mere 6 months old, I was surprised! Aa was not even close. I wondered how long will she take to sit. She has started sitting unsupported since 15 days now. Since then, I have seen huge developments in her activities. I think she is undergoing growth spurts.
She understands a lot more than she did a fortnight back. A slightly high pitched "NO" and she stops in her tracks to the wires. She associates voice with the person; can recognise lullabys from reprimands; screams in my absence; cries when a toy she is playing with, is taken away from her.
And physically too, she is pacing up. She sat, rocked and crawled (like full lenghts without falling) within 2-3 days. Now she finds sitting and crawling boring, so she holds me for support and stands up!! And here I was wondering when she will sit. In a blink of an eye she has done all this.
She is getting verbal too. Since yesterday she has started to make more meaningful sounds, not just gurgles. She started repeating "bababababababa" and "papapapapapa" all of a sudden yesterday evening! When we repeated the same to her, she found it immensly funny and burst into peels of laughter. Would have loved to upload the same. Maybe tomorrow.
I am sure all the babies are as smart and must be doing the same thing world wide. But that's the thing about your "own" baby, anything it does, you find it fascinating and boast worthy. Every parent feels proud of his/ her child's milestones. Hell, it is exciting even if it poops a different colour one day!
I am proud! Yes. Very. Very. Very!
However tired I may be, I look forward to the next day. Waiting for Aa to do something new, make a new face, try a new trick.
Aa, mommy looooooooooves you! Muah!
Thursday, 23 August 2012
Day 23 :: What made me happy today
We are on a roll! We invited some of KK's friends over for snacks. I presume you already know my friendship with cooking? Yeah, I kind of get all goosy when people come over. I never know what to make.
This time I called the shots and decided for myself what I would do. And I did! Successfully! Everything turned out great!
I feel content when guest who come, leave happily with a smile on their face. It's wonderful to know that they had a good time and enjoyed themselves. Yes, this is what makes me happy today. I am glowing at such a nice evening. I am dead tired now, but I am still *glowing*.
What made you happy today?
This time I called the shots and decided for myself what I would do. And I did! Successfully! Everything turned out great!
I feel content when guest who come, leave happily with a smile on their face. It's wonderful to know that they had a good time and enjoyed themselves. Yes, this is what makes me happy today. I am glowing at such a nice evening. I am dead tired now, but I am still *glowing*.
What made you happy today?
Wednesday, 22 August 2012
Day 22 :: Reunited!
Deepak and Shweta were the first friends in US with whom we hit off instantly. We have spent many happy hours in each others company.
Shweta made my life livable here. With such dearth of good friends, I found solace in her. We ranted, bitched, complained, laughed and shopped together. Our happiness knew no bounds when we broke the news of our respective pregnancies. We had the same due dates. And no, we hadn't planned that.
Now they live in a different area, a little far from where we live. But that didn't stop us from having a good time. We loved their company after a very long time and this time with our kids trying to pull each other's hair, lord! did we enjoy! Posting some snaps of the two "new" friends.
Shweta made my life livable here. With such dearth of good friends, I found solace in her. We ranted, bitched, complained, laughed and shopped together. Our happiness knew no bounds when we broke the news of our respective pregnancies. We had the same due dates. And no, we hadn't planned that.
Now they live in a different area, a little far from where we live. But that didn't stop us from having a good time. We loved their company after a very long time and this time with our kids trying to pull each other's hair, lord! did we enjoy! Posting some snaps of the two "new" friends.
Happy Aarnavi! Happy to see some new faces!!!
"Look mama! Even I can pull her hair." - Avi
"Dadddy look, tongue comes out when avi pulls my hair!" - Aarnavi
"Yay!!!" - Avi
"Am I supposed to clap too?" - Aarnavi
Tuesday, 21 August 2012
Day 21 :: True Words These
"You can never be a mother without bearing pain. This is just the beginning of it." - my mom, when I complained of a variety of pains I underwent post delivery
"Be it a love marriage or an arranged one, your real life will start only when you start cohabiting." - V, when I was at the threshold of a life changing event, my marriage
"So what if you are a girl, your hand shake should always be a firm one!" - my uncle when I'd grasped his hand nimbly during a handshake.
"If you start thinking about the commercial success of your book, you will never write one." - KK, when I wondered how well my book would do commercially if I ever write one
"Always refer to your in-laws as 'my in-laws'; never 'my husband's parents'. This will bring you closer to them." -Vru, my ex colleague and a good friend
:) aren't they awesome. These are some words that keep ringing on my ears again and again.
Casually someone says something in the heat of the moment, and there is so much depth in it. I do believe in all of these above and I abide by them.
Will post some more when I remember them. These advices are worth sharing.
"Be it a love marriage or an arranged one, your real life will start only when you start cohabiting." - V, when I was at the threshold of a life changing event, my marriage
"So what if you are a girl, your hand shake should always be a firm one!" - my uncle when I'd grasped his hand nimbly during a handshake.
"If you start thinking about the commercial success of your book, you will never write one." - KK, when I wondered how well my book would do commercially if I ever write one
"Always refer to your in-laws as 'my in-laws'; never 'my husband's parents'. This will bring you closer to them." -Vru, my ex colleague and a good friend
:) aren't they awesome. These are some words that keep ringing on my ears again and again.
Casually someone says something in the heat of the moment, and there is so much depth in it. I do believe in all of these above and I abide by them.
Will post some more when I remember them. These advices are worth sharing.
Monday, 20 August 2012
Day 20 :: Kiss a Bye
1:00 AM
She felt his embrace against her. She cooed to him in sleep "You came back? I didn't expect you till tomorrow evening."
"I came to say bye, honey. I am leaving.", he whispered into her ears and lightly brushed his lips against her cheeks.
Her eyes flew open. And she sat up straight in her bed. There was no one!
1:05 AM
Aaarghh! It was a dream of course! How in this world was it possible? He'd just left in the late evening! And was not expected until the next day.
And god! Was that some real feeling of his embrace! And the kiss!
1:10 AM
'Nothing's gonna change my love for you....' her cell phone rang. She smiled; it was him.
"Darling you won't believe.... Hello? Hello?" There was no one speaking at the other end. She heard only some men shouting indistinctly and a siren wailing.
She cut the call. What the hell!
1:15 AM
'Nothing's gonna...' her phone sang again. Terrified, she cut the call yet again.
She called back; all she could hear was muffled voices combined with static.
She started debating whether or not to call back.
1:25 AM
The phone rang again. The romantic song now had started to sound eerie.
"Ma'am, does this phone belong to your husband?"
"Yes, why? And who is this? Where is my husband?"
"Ma'am, I am sorry to say but your husband was killed in a car accident. We will have to ask you to come and identify his body."
"Killed? Are you sure he is no more?" she asked calmly.
"I am sorry again. But yes, ma'am, he is no more."
"When did this happen?" she croaked, her eyes brimming with tears.
"Our estimate is around half an hour back, ma'am."
She felt his embrace against her. She cooed to him in sleep "You came back? I didn't expect you till tomorrow evening."
"I came to say bye, honey. I am leaving.", he whispered into her ears and lightly brushed his lips against her cheeks.
Her eyes flew open. And she sat up straight in her bed. There was no one!
1:05 AM
Aaarghh! It was a dream of course! How in this world was it possible? He'd just left in the late evening! And was not expected until the next day.
And god! Was that some real feeling of his embrace! And the kiss!
1:10 AM
'Nothing's gonna change my love for you....' her cell phone rang. She smiled; it was him.
"Darling you won't believe.... Hello? Hello?" There was no one speaking at the other end. She heard only some men shouting indistinctly and a siren wailing.
She cut the call. What the hell!
1:15 AM
'Nothing's gonna...' her phone sang again. Terrified, she cut the call yet again.
She called back; all she could hear was muffled voices combined with static.
She started debating whether or not to call back.
1:25 AM
The phone rang again. The romantic song now had started to sound eerie.
"Ma'am, does this phone belong to your husband?"
"Yes, why? And who is this? Where is my husband?"
"Ma'am, I am sorry to say but your husband was killed in a car accident. We will have to ask you to come and identify his body."
"Killed? Are you sure he is no more?" she asked calmly.
"I am sorry again. But yes, ma'am, he is no more."
"When did this happen?" she croaked, her eyes brimming with tears.
"Our estimate is around half an hour back, ma'am."
Sunday, 19 August 2012
Day 19 :: Cook-a-doodle
Cooking is not my favourite activity. In fact, if it acts like a stress buster for many, this activity is the main cause for stress in my life. Si if you see black circles under my eyes, it is most certainly the cooking.
Having made such catastrophic statement, that too being a woman; let me say that it is highly stereotyped that all women love cooking. I dislike it. I think cooking a meal that too everyday is a pathetic way to hell. It is my personal feeling though. I certainly do not intend to say that anyone who loves it, are pathetic. Believe me, I love eating. Not quantities though. I like the process of eating, but let's not get into that now.
Before marriage, there were all kinds of excusable reasons for not entering the kitchen. However once you are done tying the knot, you are expected to be the masterchef.
It is not to be mistaken that I cannot cook at all. I do manage to dress up the table with a decent meal and at times tasty too. I find it too tiresome to tax myself thinking day after day "what to cook?". I truly can never come up with something myself. I have to resort to cook books or the net for the same. If we are having guests at home, I'd be thinking hours and hours for one dish. My brain somersaults at the thought of cooking!
Give me a blank page and I will write something decent, but give me 5 ingredients and I will be running around in circles. There are a lot of women out there, who are enthused about cooking. Some even have blogs dedicated exclusively to their kitchen encounters. People might think that I am jealous of such bloggers. But no, I truly appreciate their patience to record and take a snap(!!!) of each and every step. In fact, I think "hmmm.... wouldn't it be nice if I could eat this right away?"
Like I mentioned earlier, I am a foodie. I watch cookery shows like a true chef would. I see every step attentively, every measurement accurately. At the end of the show, I'd be saliviating. Only if you ask me what went into making a delectable dish, I'd probably shrug off in reply because I never really paid attention to how it was done, rather I was busy thinking how nice would it be if someone made this for me!!!!
My mom thinks it is shameful that instead of mending my ways, I shamefully admit that I hate cooking. But where is it written that women should be passionate about cooking? It's just that I am not. That's it. I think it is better not to decieve myself of this wayward truth of my life. I do make something to eat everyday, don't I? When I invite people over, even though I spent ample amount thinking than on the action, I do it. It's not that I blatantly refuse to cook.
And one more thing, there have been more misses than hits in my kitchen adventures. I do not mind saying that even, openly. Hence, the displeasure.
Having made such catastrophic statement, that too being a woman; let me say that it is highly stereotyped that all women love cooking. I dislike it. I think cooking a meal that too everyday is a pathetic way to hell. It is my personal feeling though. I certainly do not intend to say that anyone who loves it, are pathetic. Believe me, I love eating. Not quantities though. I like the process of eating, but let's not get into that now.
Before marriage, there were all kinds of excusable reasons for not entering the kitchen. However once you are done tying the knot, you are expected to be the masterchef.
It is not to be mistaken that I cannot cook at all. I do manage to dress up the table with a decent meal and at times tasty too. I find it too tiresome to tax myself thinking day after day "what to cook?". I truly can never come up with something myself. I have to resort to cook books or the net for the same. If we are having guests at home, I'd be thinking hours and hours for one dish. My brain somersaults at the thought of cooking!
Give me a blank page and I will write something decent, but give me 5 ingredients and I will be running around in circles. There are a lot of women out there, who are enthused about cooking. Some even have blogs dedicated exclusively to their kitchen encounters. People might think that I am jealous of such bloggers. But no, I truly appreciate their patience to record and take a snap(!!!) of each and every step. In fact, I think "hmmm.... wouldn't it be nice if I could eat this right away?"
Like I mentioned earlier, I am a foodie. I watch cookery shows like a true chef would. I see every step attentively, every measurement accurately. At the end of the show, I'd be saliviating. Only if you ask me what went into making a delectable dish, I'd probably shrug off in reply because I never really paid attention to how it was done, rather I was busy thinking how nice would it be if someone made this for me!!!!
My mom thinks it is shameful that instead of mending my ways, I shamefully admit that I hate cooking. But where is it written that women should be passionate about cooking? It's just that I am not. That's it. I think it is better not to decieve myself of this wayward truth of my life. I do make something to eat everyday, don't I? When I invite people over, even though I spent ample amount thinking than on the action, I do it. It's not that I blatantly refuse to cook.
And one more thing, there have been more misses than hits in my kitchen adventures. I do not mind saying that even, openly. Hence, the displeasure.
Saturday, 18 August 2012
Day 18 :: Friends here
Yes!!!! After a very very long time today, we invited some friends over. Now I realize how much I missed socializing in a while.
One importance of having friends at such close quarters is that you can unload a lot and forget the drab.
Am currently enjoying a long chat with a friend who was kind enough to accept our invitation to stay over.
Bliss!
One importance of having friends at such close quarters is that you can unload a lot and forget the drab.
Am currently enjoying a long chat with a friend who was kind enough to accept our invitation to stay over.
Bliss!
Friday, 17 August 2012
Day 17 :: Being Spineless
I have encountered many people who believe in letting go. I think it is a good as long as it lets you stay in peace. That is the most important thing, isn't it?
Call it a way of life or that people have started being more indifferent and insensitive to each other. It isn't easy to escape taunts, vile remarks, injustice or rudeness nowadays. It's just there. It depends on the receptor how he deals with all that. Some prefer to give it all back and oters will keep mum. Like I said, whatever makes you happy.
I wonder why people would want to take it all in, only to complain behind the back. I believe that if you have a problem then talk it out. If it troubles you, say it. If anything gets to you on a personal level, stand up for yourself. Is taking shit from people a better option than feeling shitty yourself?
In my office, there was an HR person, who thought she was above all. She thought she had this "HR" aura about her and that she was untouchable. It didn't bother me any more than it was digusting. Well I kept to myself. She was her way, I was mine. Slowly she started pulling people up and giving them a earful left, right center for work not well done. Now, considering the situation in the office, that was certainly needed. She thought of a way out, instead of selecting employees here and there, why not call every one and tell them that their job is below expected standards. And that's what she did.
It was my turn and she told me so, curtly, without even bothering to look at my work history. I was certainly pissed at such lowly manner, she dealt with me. I said "Prove it." And her jaw dropped.
I said "Sorry to say but I am not gonna accept anything you say here, unless you give me a solid proof of what you are accusing me of. I can give you the proof of my job being done accurately and not you and not even the bigger boss will be able to reiterate that."
She was fuming.
And that was just one of many. Other employees were raging too, but were too timid to speak up. They expected me to speak up and stand up for them, which I didn't. I think each person should e able to say a rightful "NO" when they are supposed to. Instead of harbouring so much bitterness for a long time, why not speak it out and get done with it?
There are such gems placed in the family too. No matter what the situation or celebration, they will love to temper the occassion with their disapproving comments that will spoil your mood.
We are often taught to respect the elders and mind our tongues when we speak with them. But that in no way means the younger do not deserve any respect. It is considered ok for them to mistreat the younger people all in the name of fun.
I have decided to be upfront and blunt wiht such people. No matter how they percieve me, but I am going to be me. If it stinges me, I am going to bite back without regrets. And that is what I have done, in the past and continue to do so.
I do let go - Once, twice and in some cases thrice. Only when the perpetrator crosses this level do I get really mean. If someone does not maintain a decorum, I don't see why I should. Why should I let someone slap me and get away with it?
How lenient can you be with such people? Do you let them hurt you and get away with it? Or do you find it easy to forgive and forget?
Call it a way of life or that people have started being more indifferent and insensitive to each other. It isn't easy to escape taunts, vile remarks, injustice or rudeness nowadays. It's just there. It depends on the receptor how he deals with all that. Some prefer to give it all back and oters will keep mum. Like I said, whatever makes you happy.
I wonder why people would want to take it all in, only to complain behind the back. I believe that if you have a problem then talk it out. If it troubles you, say it. If anything gets to you on a personal level, stand up for yourself. Is taking shit from people a better option than feeling shitty yourself?
In my office, there was an HR person, who thought she was above all. She thought she had this "HR" aura about her and that she was untouchable. It didn't bother me any more than it was digusting. Well I kept to myself. She was her way, I was mine. Slowly she started pulling people up and giving them a earful left, right center for work not well done. Now, considering the situation in the office, that was certainly needed. She thought of a way out, instead of selecting employees here and there, why not call every one and tell them that their job is below expected standards. And that's what she did.
It was my turn and she told me so, curtly, without even bothering to look at my work history. I was certainly pissed at such lowly manner, she dealt with me. I said "Prove it." And her jaw dropped.
I said "Sorry to say but I am not gonna accept anything you say here, unless you give me a solid proof of what you are accusing me of. I can give you the proof of my job being done accurately and not you and not even the bigger boss will be able to reiterate that."
She was fuming.
And that was just one of many. Other employees were raging too, but were too timid to speak up. They expected me to speak up and stand up for them, which I didn't. I think each person should e able to say a rightful "NO" when they are supposed to. Instead of harbouring so much bitterness for a long time, why not speak it out and get done with it?
There are such gems placed in the family too. No matter what the situation or celebration, they will love to temper the occassion with their disapproving comments that will spoil your mood.
We are often taught to respect the elders and mind our tongues when we speak with them. But that in no way means the younger do not deserve any respect. It is considered ok for them to mistreat the younger people all in the name of fun.
I have decided to be upfront and blunt wiht such people. No matter how they percieve me, but I am going to be me. If it stinges me, I am going to bite back without regrets. And that is what I have done, in the past and continue to do so.
I do let go - Once, twice and in some cases thrice. Only when the perpetrator crosses this level do I get really mean. If someone does not maintain a decorum, I don't see why I should. Why should I let someone slap me and get away with it?
How lenient can you be with such people? Do you let them hurt you and get away with it? Or do you find it easy to forgive and forget?
Thursday, 16 August 2012
Day 16 :: Tagged like never before
Uma tagged me long back with this one, and I have been putting it off for later. Copy + pasting the rules. Please do not complain about plagiarism! :P
1. You must post the rules.
2. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post & then create 11 new questions to ask the people you’ve tagged.
3. Tag 11 people and link to them on your post.
4. Let them know you’ve tagged them!
Here are the eleven questions that Uma has thrown at me. :|
1. You must post the rules.
2. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post & then create 11 new questions to ask the people you’ve tagged.
3. Tag 11 people and link to them on your post.
4. Let them know you’ve tagged them!
Here are the eleven questions that Uma has thrown at me. :|
- Which was the recent book you read and what is your take on it? - Recent Book? Tee hee! Well, I did manage to read one of my favorite author, Preeti Shenoy's book, "Tea for Two and a Piece of Cake". Umm... It was nice. As in good narration. Story wise it was ok, I predicted the flow. But let me say, her first two books were better than this one. My personal take.
- If you were to choose between the Epic characters Karna and Bhishma, whom would you choose and why? - I'd be Karna perhaps. Simple, he is like me.
- Which was been your most memorable trip so far? Any incidents or anecdotes you'd care to share? - Las Vegas trip! Totally! Anecdotes are a secret. ;)
- Mountains or the sea? - Sea
- What is the one thing (dream/ ambition) you would like to accomplish yet? - Would you believe it if I said I don't have any dreams?
- What according to you makes a good writer/blogger? Do you consider yourself as one? - Leaving all humility in a box, I do consider myself a good blogger. Readers of this blog have good things to say about my write ups, and I am frequently at it. I think that's what makes me a good blogger.
- What is your favourite outfit? - Loose T shirt and Pjs - Yes it IS an outfit.
- Who is better: Sachin Tendulkar or Rahul Dravid? - I wouldn't know. Seriously. Not a cricket buff really. I'd say both.
- If you had the power to change one thing about yourself or your life so far, what would it be? - Ha! Rebirth. I'd change the entire me.
- Are you in touch with your best friend from school days? - I didn't have any best friend in school. Yeah I am lousy at socializing.
- What was/is your favourite subject in school/college? why? - Costing in college. I think it takes a good prof to make you like a subject.
Ok so here goes
1. You have your set of daily chores. What's the one thing you hate the most?
2. You are supposed to be participating in the next Olympics. Your sport is?
3. What would you rather do - learn a new language or teach a language to someone? Why?
4. What do most people lack according to you?
5. Do you have any regrets in life? Is it in any way repairable?
6. If you were asked to blog right now, what would it be? Not this tag, puhleezz!
7. You are crossing the road when a car screeches to halt. ACP Pradyumn opens the door and says "Aap mere saath bureau chaliye..." Your reaction would be?
8. Your favourite quote is?
9. If you had to meet your "strictly online" friend, where would be best place? And would you trust him/ her to turn up?
10. Do you have recurring dreams/ nightmares? Care to share?
11. Easy one now. Why? Why? Why? :P
I tag, N, Namratha and muhahhaha, Uma! (I don't know anyone except these)
Wednesday, 15 August 2012
Day 15 :: Mid Blogathon Post
I intended on doing a longish post today. That certainly doesn't seem to be happening. Not at this hour.
Did you take notice that I am already half way through my Blogathon? I was surprised! It's been a tough pull; these 15 days, yet attainable. I did it, didn't I? It takes immense efforts, not for the posts, but to keep up with the promise of blogging daily.
Initially, I admit, I had cold feet but now it feels great to be back to my blog so frequently. Blogging Is my stress-buster and calms me. Something what meditation does to many. It is like a coolant. At the end of the day, although I need to think what to write, once the job's done, I sleep peacefully.
There are still 15 more posts this month and I hope you will stick with me. Until tomorrow, ciao!
Did you take notice that I am already half way through my Blogathon? I was surprised! It's been a tough pull; these 15 days, yet attainable. I did it, didn't I? It takes immense efforts, not for the posts, but to keep up with the promise of blogging daily.
Initially, I admit, I had cold feet but now it feels great to be back to my blog so frequently. Blogging Is my stress-buster and calms me. Something what meditation does to many. It is like a coolant. At the end of the day, although I need to think what to write, once the job's done, I sleep peacefully.
There are still 15 more posts this month and I hope you will stick with me. Until tomorrow, ciao!
Tuesday, 14 August 2012
Day 14 :: How did you know my name?
Priest : Your name?
Me : Pu.... (realizing it's a pooja on the husband's side) No, Kavya.
Priest : So your name's Purnima.
Me : Eh? How did you know? I didn't tell you that.
Priest : I saw the tattoo on your husband's arm!
Me : Pu.... (realizing it's a pooja on the husband's side) No, Kavya.
Priest : So your name's Purnima.
Me : Eh? How did you know? I didn't tell you that.
Priest : I saw the tattoo on your husband's arm!
Monday, 13 August 2012
Day 13 :: Discovering Self
13 things I have newly discovered about myself
1. I can let go of things that disturb me. It is very difficult, but I have been capable of doing it.
2. I can finish my kitchen chores within 45 minutes (Aa's morning nap time) - cooking, cleaning et al.
3. I can lose weight! YAY!
4. I can be very observant if I choose to be.
5. I can set a goal and achieve it too.
6. I can willingly forgo chocolate and cheese. (Of course, not permanently!)
7. I can make a beginning and see it till the end.
8. I can live without many things that I thought I could never live without!
9. I can forgive myself for bad cooking.
10. I can look after Aa, which I thought would be an impossible task.
11. I can understand a lot of things my mother used to tell me. (Yeah, now!)
12. I can stay alive without my 10 hour daily, beauty sleep.
and
13. I can (still) let my mind wander to places of my imagination.
:) :) :)
1. I can let go of things that disturb me. It is very difficult, but I have been capable of doing it.
2. I can finish my kitchen chores within 45 minutes (Aa's morning nap time) - cooking, cleaning et al.
3. I can lose weight! YAY!
4. I can be very observant if I choose to be.
5. I can set a goal and achieve it too.
6. I can willingly forgo chocolate and cheese. (Of course, not permanently!)
7. I can make a beginning and see it till the end.
8. I can live without many things that I thought I could never live without!
9. I can forgive myself for bad cooking.
10. I can look after Aa, which I thought would be an impossible task.
11. I can understand a lot of things my mother used to tell me. (Yeah, now!)
12. I can stay alive without my 10 hour daily, beauty sleep.
and
13. I can (still) let my mind wander to places of my imagination.
:) :) :)
Sunday, 12 August 2012
Day :: 12 Taking it for Granted
After ages today, I got to enjoy full five minutes, all to myself. While I sat enjoying a cup of coffee, the silence that engulfed me, allowed some deep introspection.
There was a time when I'd get restless if I didn't have my "me" time throughout the day. And then there is today, the day begins as soon as it starts. I'd have never thought of giving up my five precious for anything.
One takes many things for granted. And it is not a conscious effort. We happen to make everything our habit and when that habit is regularly practiced, we tend to think that nothing will ever change. Like I took my pencil thin body structure for granted. Like I took my five minutes a day for granted.
Have you taken anything or anyone for granted only to realize later?
There was a time when I'd get restless if I didn't have my "me" time throughout the day. And then there is today, the day begins as soon as it starts. I'd have never thought of giving up my five precious for anything.
One takes many things for granted. And it is not a conscious effort. We happen to make everything our habit and when that habit is regularly practiced, we tend to think that nothing will ever change. Like I took my pencil thin body structure for granted. Like I took my five minutes a day for granted.
Have you taken anything or anyone for granted only to realize later?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
LinkWithin
